Reach the other-Atteindre l'autre
by Rhaella Tully
Summary: English/Français. Juvia get hurt during a mission and can only remember her first language: the french. Gruvia. Readable even if you don't speak both language/ Juvia se blesse pendant une mision et ne peut se souvenir que de sa langue maternelle le français. Gruvia. Lisible même si vous ne parler pas les deux langues
1. Prologue

**AN/ This is a English/French fic so don't be surprised if the language change after half of the text they still will be dialogue in English so you still be able to understand what's happening. This is a Juvia POV but you know that she's talking at third person anyway you're inside her head. **

**C'est une fic en anglais et en français. Mais si vous ne parlez pas anglais vous pouvez directement aller à la moitié du texte. Vous devriez être capable de comprendre à partir de ce moment. Aussi l'histoire se fait au point de vue de Juvia mais bon, vous savez qu'elle parle à la troisième personne, alors …**

Juvia was in the guildhall chatting with Gajeel-Kun and Panther Lily, well mostly with Panther Lily, when Gray-sama came to her. He asked her if they could talk privately. Juvia said yes and they went out of the guild.

He looked at her and said."Look, I don't want to hurt your feelings but I can't leave like this anymore. I can't have you stalking me wherever I go and whatever I do. I don't love you. I will never ever love you. You're stupid, boring and depressing. So please stop." And then he went to Juvia's love rival.

The words kept ringing in her ears _don't love you …never ever love you … stupid … boring… depressing …depressing … depressing_. Juvia's heart had just been broke. She felt tears running down her cheeks; the hall world seemed to be falling apart. She had been hurt before but never to that point. Clouds gather up from Juvia's head. It was hall dark. No. No, no, no, no, no, you're not coming back. You're coming back! Juvia felt raindrops falling one her head. Why are you back? Juvia started to cry louder because she knew the answer and knew that they were no way back. Juvia tried to wipe her tears a way but they kept on coming. She needed to go inside the guild, to have her friend held her and told her that everything was okay. But she heard their voices.

"Shit it's raining!" "It's so depressing." "But it was clear one minute ago." "I hope it will go away" "Don't tell me it's the fucking rain woman doing that"

Juvia put her hand on her ears but sound kept coming in. Everyone was putting the balm on her. Everyone was mad at her. Everyone wanted her to go far away from them. Everyone hated her. Rain was pounding harder and her tears were running faster. She was trying but she couldn't breathe. The world was falling apart.

"Ameonna."

Juvia turned her head to see Gajeel-kun in front of her. He was her best friend; he would never let her down.

"We have talk and we want you to leave the guild." He told her. And walk back inside.

Juvia screamed as she woke up, she had tears running down her cheeks and was all sweaty. But she relief, it was just a bad dream. She just had, once again, a nightmare in which Gray-sama was telling her, like so many had done before, that she was as depressing as the rain. Then the clouds were coming back, the rain started to fall again this time with no way out. Her friends told her to go away that they never wanted to see her again. It was awful but she was starting to get used to it. Since she was little Juvia always had dream about the worst thing that could happen to her, as if her mind wanted her to ready. But Juvia couldn't think of one as painful as that. Before her worst fear was death or not being able to use magic anymore. Dreaming about that was rough but she gets easily over it. Now her worst fear was rejection, loneliness and rain. Now that she had friends and people to love she could bare to imagine spending one day without talking to them. That was her worst fear. But she knew them and she knew that even if the rain came back they would always be here for her. Of that she was sure. Her nightmares were just nightmares. Having them might take her a few hours of sleep and scared her but they will never be true. Never.

Juvia turned to her clock, it was 4 a.m., and she stood out of her bed and went to her bathroom. Juvia washes her face and look at herself in the mirror. She had dark rings under her eyes. Well, after all that was the third time in three nights that she had this kind of nightmare. It was weird thought. Of course Juvia was always worried that we try to take her Gray-sama away from her. But when she had those nightmares it was when she was seriously worried about the future. She wasn't or was she? Juvia was too tired to think about that. She should take a coffee. She wasn't going back to sleep. As much as she knew her nightmare would never come true she didn't want to live them.

Once the sun was up Juvia went to the train station. She and Gajeel-kun were going on a mission just the two of them. Just like old time ! Juvia was pretty excited about it. She loved to go on mission with Gajeel-kun all most as much as going with Gray-sama. Ever since we were in the same guild we always had done mission together. He was Juvia first and best friend. We knew each other like the back of our hands. That's why Juvia knew her dream couldn't become true. He will always be by her side even if the rest of guild wasn't, like she was by him when he entered the guild. Now she was thinking about her awful dream again. Juvia started to shake her head to make the thought go out.

"What the hell are you doing Ameonna?"

Juvia stopped and froze in front of him. Gajeel-kun looked at her from up to down.

Please don't make a comment about how tired I look. Don't ask me why. I don't want talk about it.

"Okay." he said "When is the train arriving?"

Juvia looked at her watch then said "He'll be here in a minute." It was great not needing to talk to be understand.

The train arrived to station we board it. The travel wasn't long we talk a little about our lives, Juvia tease him about a certain bookworm, he said a certain stripper was gay, we laugh.

"Hey, ameonna !"

Juvia stopped laughing and looked at him.

"We're here."He told Juvia. She looked at the window. She could see the train station. She quickly grabs her bag and step out of the train. She took the request out of her bag.

_Brigands have been attacking our town._

_Some of them use magic._

_Please help us. Kimugi town._

_Come to the mayor office._

_Reward: 10000 jewels._

"We must go to the city hall to meet the mayor" Juvia told Gajeel-kun. He nodded, we went out of the station. We walk to the city square; they were an old building with a sign saying City Hall. We went in and ask to a receptionist where the mayor office was. She told us the way. We follow her leads nock on the door and came in. It was a big room with bookcase on the side walls and a window on the back wall. In front of us were a desk with two chairs in front, one behind and paper all over the top. On the behind chair a small skinny man was sitting. The mayor, Juvia presumes. He looked up to us and asked.

"What can I do for you?"

"We are the mage send by Fairy Tail." Juvia answer.

"Great. Thank you for coming. Those brigands are seriously causing trouble. They're steeling and destroying everything on their way. We really hope you'll get us freed of them."

"We will. Could you tell us what you know about them?"

"Yes of course. We know that they live in the forest nearby here. Three of them use magic we don't know which one."

"That will do" Juvia said turning to Gajeel-kun.

"Easy" he simply said.

We went out of the office and the city hall. Walk through the town passing by a hat shop. Juvia made the mental note to go take a look once the job's done. After two hours of searching we finally find the brigand. Quickly the fight started. One of them was a fire mage. Nothing easier for Juvia. She simply locked him in her water lock in a few minutes and he was unconscious. Gajeel-kun took down a shadow mage in less than two second. Between the brigands left only one use magic, they were both smirking; we were on our guard but suddenly everything started to change. Juvia was in her native village she looked down at her and saw that she was in a little girl shape. Rain started to fall. She saw it but she didn't feel or ear it. A visual illusion.

"Gajeel-kun, you're affecting to?" Juvia ask.

"Yeah. Don't move." He answered Juvia. She followed his lead. Even if what he sees is fake. His ears would be his eyes. So, Juvia stood here earring move and punch seeing rain. She wasn't worried, she trusted Gajeel-kun. She knew he'll get her out of this. But then she felt her body flying and her head crash against something hard. Juvia eared Gajeel-kun voice calling her name then the black holes.

Quand Juvia repris connaissance elle vit d'abord une surface blanche, qu'elle identifia comme un plafond. Elle se demanda où elle se trouvait. Juvia tourna la tête vers la droite. Cet effort lui provoqua des douleurs au crâne qui lui firent fermer les yeux. Elle les rouvrit et découvrit une salle entièrement blanche. Elle aperçu sur une chaise Gajeel-kun qui regardait à la fenêtre, cela la rassura.

« Gajeel-kun . »Le son de la voix de Juvia attira son attention. Il se tourna immédiatement vers elle.

« Juvia you're awake ! dit Gajeel-kun, Are you alright?

- Quoi ? » Lui demanda Juvia. Elle ne comprenait pas ce qu'il disait. Elle se demandait pourquoi.

« Juvia are you alright ? » Répéta-t-il.

Mais Juvia ne comprenait toujours pas. Elle le regarda et comprit qu'il se demandait comment Juvia se sentait.

« Juvia va bien Gajeel-kun, mais elle ne comprend pas ce que tu dis. » Il regarda Juvia bizarrement. Il alla vers la porte, l'ouvrit et dit :

« Nurse could you call the doctor. … she is awake. »

Il referma la porte et reviens s'asseoir près de Juvia.

« Où est Juvia ? » lui demanda-t-elle. Gajeel-kun regarda la mage d'eau mais ne répondit pas. Elle était maintenant inquiète. Pourquoi n'avait elle pas comprit ce qu'il disait ? Est-ce que lui non plus ne la comprenait pas ? C'est pour cela qu'il ne répondait pas ? Et pourquoi avait-elle autant mal au crâne ? Soudain elle se souvint de ce qu'il s'était passé plus tôt. Elle avait reçu un violant coup à la tête qui l'avait rendu inconsciente. Elle posa sa main sur sa tête et y découvrit des bandages. Elle avait des bandages. Tout était blanc. Elle était sur un lit relativement inconfortable. C'était clair que Juvia était à l'hôpital.

« Est ce que c'est grave ? » demanda Juvia même si son ami ne comprenait pas ce qu'elle disait, il saurait ce qu'elle demandait.

« I don't know. » Répondit-il. Il semblait inquiet. Il ne le savait pas mais il se doutait que ça l'était. Ca ne rassurait pas Juvia. Comment ce pouvait-il qu'elle ne comprenne pas ce que Gajeel-kun disait. Elle parlait pourtant parfaitement anglais elle y était tellement habituer qu'elle le pensait … mais en ce moment, Juvia pense en français ! Juvia… Juvia… Juvia… Je… Juvia n'arrive pas à penser en anglais! Mais ce n'est pas possible ! Que ce passe-t-il ?

Juvia entendit la porte s'ouvrir. Un homme portant une blouse blanche entra. Il devait être docteur. Il regarda Juvia puis dit :

« Good morrning Miss Lockser. I'm the doctor Lordat. How are you feeling ? »

Juvia ne compris pas un traitre mot de ce qu'il disait.

« I don't think she understands. » Lui dit Gajeel-kun. Elle ne comprit de nouveau mais elle pouvait deviner que Gajeel-kun expliquait au docteur que Juvia ne comprenait pas.

« She dosen't speak ? » Lui questionna le docteur. Juvia se demanda ce qu'ils pouvaient bien se dire.

« She does but not in English. »

« Is she a bilingual ? » Etant donné le ton qu'avait pris le médecin, Juvia devina qu'il avait posé une question.

« Yes, she wasn't born in Fiore. » Gajeel-kun avais acquiescé et ajouté une information … en rapport avec Fiore et avec elle surement. Venait-il de lui dire qu'elle était française de naissance ?

« Where does she come from? » Le docteur posa une autre question.

« From France.» Oui, il lui a dit.

« I think she is suffering from of aphasia. » Dit le docteur… Surement un diagnostic…

« Aphasia ? » Répéta Gajeel-kun. Apparemment lui non plus n'avais pas compris.

« It's an amnesia of the language. I think she have forgot entirely english and propebly a litlle of the french too. I think we have a french nurse. I'll see if I can find her. We're going to need to make her an MRI. You better call you're guild and tell them she's awake. »Puis il sortit rapidement de la chambre. S'il sortait si vite, peut être était-ce grave.

« I'll be back in a minute don't worry. » Gajeel-kun quitta lui aussi la chambre.

Il était partit aussi vite que le docteur. Il était tendu. Ce n'était pas une bonne nouvelle, il était rarement comme ça. Il savait que Juvia était forte. Qu'est-ce que le médecin avait dit ? Pourquoi Gajeel-kun est-il inquiet? Est-ce que l'incapacité de Juvia a parlé anglais venait d'un problème plus grave? Ou était parti Gajeel-kun ? Reviendra-t-il bientôt ?

Juvia avait peur, souffrait et était seule.

**AN/ Thank you very much for reading. How was that first chapter? Was it good? Was it awful to the point you throw up while reading it? Review and tell me**

**For next chapters: They will be two at a time one of them in French (still a Juvia POV) and one in English. The English one will be POV of other characters, most of the time Gray. I'm not English, I'm not perfectly bilingual and I'm dyslexic so if you see anything wrong with my orthography or my grammar in English or in French tell me please.**

**Merci beaucoup d'avoir lu. Comment était ce premier chapitre ? C'était bien ? C'était mauvais au point de vous faire vomir pendant que vous lisiez ? Laissez un commentaire et dites le moi. **

**Pour les prochains chapitres : Il y en aura deux à la fois. Un en français (toujours du point de vue de Juvia) et un en anglais. Celui en anglais sera le point de vue d'autres personnages, la plus part du temps Gray. Je ne suis pas anglaise, je ne suis pas parfaitement bilingue et je suis dyslexique alors si vous voyez la moindre faute d'orthographe ou de grammaire en anglais comme en français, faites le moi savoir s'il vous plait.**


	2. Chapitre 1 Les Fleurs du Mal

**AN/ Disclamer : **

**- Je ne suis pas médecin, je me suis renseigner mais sa ne veut pas dire que tous se qui est écrit dans se texte est forcément vraie. **

**- Je ne dit pas que Balzac est un mauvaise auteur loin de là, mais le lire a 13 ans c'est un coup a te dégouter a vis. Merci prof de français de 4****ème**** .**

* * *

><p>Il faisait noir. La seule lumière visible était celle des éclairs, au dehors. Le vent et la pluie cognaient violemment contre les vitres. Juvia marchait seule, le long du couloir blanc de l'hôpital. Elle n'entendait que le son de la pluie et de ses pieds nus contre le sol froid. Juvia marchait, courait parfois, faisait des allers et venues, cherchant désespérément une sortie. Epuisée, elle s'appuya contre un mur. Elle ne savait pas pourquoi, mais elle avait peur. Des larmes lui coulèrent le long des joues. Elle n'essaya pas de les arrêter, pleurer lui faisait du bien. Un flash de lumière causé par un éclair lui fît apercevoir des formes par la fenêtre au bout du couloir. Elle avança jusque là. A chaque pas qu'elle effectuait, sa peur se décuplait. Juvia s'appuya au rebord de la fenêtre et observa l'obscurité attendant qu'un nouvel éclair l'illumine afin de voir ce qui se trouvait de l'autre côté de la vitre. Il arriva et pendant une fraction de secondes, elle vit tous ses amis, tous ceux qu'elle aimait, de l'autre coté. Juvia frappa la vitre de toutes ses forces en les appelants espérant qu'ils l'entendent et qu'ils la sortent d'ici. Un nouveau flash de lumière apparu et la moitié d'entre eux avaient disparut.<p>

« Ne partez pas ! Cria Juvia tout en frappant de ses deux mains contre la vitre, Juvia est là ! Il faut qu'elle sorte ! Aidez Juvia ! S'il vou-» Elle fut coupée par un éclair qui lui montra qu'il ne restait pas plus de dix personnes dehors. Juvia frappa de nouveau et cria :

« Gray-sama ! Gajeel-kun ! Cana-san ! Lisanna-san ! Lyon-sama ! Lev- » Le son du tonnerre la coupa, il ne restait que Gray-sama, Gajeel-kun et Lyon-sama. Juvia essaya de les appeler mais sa voix refusait de sortir.

La foudre frappa de nouveau et sa lumière resta présente. Mais il ne restait maintenant que Gray-sama. Il regardait Juvia droit dans les yeux mais son regard était vide, il se retourna. Juvia essaya de crier pour qu'il revienne mais sa voix lui faisait défaut. Il disparut et la lumière avec. Juvia pleurait de plus en plus fort, elle avait l'impression que des mains serraient son cœur et à chaque larme, leur étreinte s'intensifiait. Soudain Juvia sentit les murs trembler, elle releva la tête et vit la vitre se fissurer. Elle s'écarta vite des murs, elle eu juste le temps de les voir voler en éclats. Elle était maintenant prise dans un typhon, le vent froid lui tranchait la peau et l'eau salée y pénétrait. La souffrance la fit crier et cette fois-ci, sa voix obéit. Ce fut-elle qui réveilla Juvia.

Elle était couverte de sueurs froides et son cœur battait à un rythme effrayant. Elle respira profondément plusieurs fois pour se calmer puis regarda autour d'elle. Elle était dans sa chambre d'hôpital, les murs étaient en place. Il ne pleuvait pas dehors, la lune illuminait le ciel et Gajeel-kun, assis sur une chaise, regardait Juvia l'air inquiet. Juvia lui fit signe qu'elle allait bien et se rallongea en lui faisant dos et essuya la sueur de son front. Juste un mauvais rêve. Juvia pouvait sentir les yeux de Gajeel-kun sur elle. Elle ne lui avait jamais parlé de ses cauchemars, elle ne le voulait pas. Juvia savait que se serait l'inquiéter pour rien. Ces mauvais rêves allaient et venaient, elle en avait parfois pendant un mois puis plus aucun pendant plusieurs années. Tout dépendait de comment elle se sentait. Depuis que Juvia avait rejoint Fairy Tail, c'était la première foi qu'elle en avait. Avant elle ne comprenait pas pourquoi, mais depuis hier, ils étaient parfaitement justifié.

* * *

><p>La veille, Juvia avait passé une heure à se demander si Gajeel-kun allait revenir ou pas quand la porte de la chambre s'ouvrit. Une jeune femme en tenue d'infirmière entra. Elle avait à peu près la même taille que Juvia et sa peau était mate. Son visage était de forme arrondi, elle avait le nez petit et fin. Ses yeux avaient une forme d'amande, étaient noisettes avec de longs cils. Ses cheveux noirs et bouclés tombaient jusqu'aux épaules. Elle était plutôt jolie. Juvia la plaça donc dans la case 'rival d'amour potentiel'. Le docteur était avec elle. Elle s'approcha du lit et dit :<p>

« Bonjour mademoiselle Lockser. Je m'appelle Manon, l'homme derrière moi est le docteur Lordat. Vous êtes à l'hôpital, votre ami vous a amené ici après que vous ayez été blessée pendant un combat. Vous êtes atteinte d'aphasie, vous avez partiellement perdu la capacité de communiquer par le langage. Nous avons besoin de vous faire une IRM le plus vite possible pour en déterminer la cause. »

Juvia la fixa un moment. Elle n'avait pas entièrement compris ce que Manon-san avait dit. Elle parlait pourtant français, non ?

«M'avez-vous comprise ? demanda l'infirmière.

- C'est quoi une IRM ?

- L'IRM est une technique médicale permettant de visualiser les organes. » Mais Juvia connaissait cela. Pourquoi ne s'en souvenait-elle pas ?

« Vous connaissiez ces mots, n'est ce pas ? Demanda Manon-san.

- Oui mais Juvia ne s'en souvenais pas.

- Votre aphasie doit aussi toucher le français. Dit-elle. » Puis, elle se tourna vers le docteur. « She also have forgot some of the french.

- Alright. Has she understood ? lui demanda-t-il.

- Yes, she has.

- I'm going to prepare the MRI. You, take care of her.

- Okay.»

Le docteur quitta la chambre. Manon-san alla s'asseoir sur la chaise à gauche du lit que Gajeel-kun occupait auparavant.

« J'ai quelque question à vous poser mademoiselle Lockser. Tout d'abord, comment vous sentez vous ?

- Juvia a mal à la tête, surtout quand elle bouge et elle a un peu faim.

- D'accord. Dit elle en notant sur sont bloc-notes. Parlez-vous souvent à la troisième personne ?

- Juvia l'a toujours fait.

- …, elle regarda Juvia bizarrement, haussa les épaules puis demanda, vous-souvenez vous de quelques mots anglais ?

- Non, pas un seul.

- Avant notre conversation, aviez-vous remarqué qu'il vous manquait du vocabulaire français ?

- Non.

- C'est bien ce que je pensais, elle écrit de nouveau sur son bloc-notes. Je pense que votre aphasie affecte les mots que vous avez appris en dernier, contrairement à la plus part des cas ou les patients oublient les mots les moins fréquemment utilisé.

- Juvia n'utilise pas fréquemment IRM.

- Mais l'anglais, si. » Juvia entendit la porte s'ouvrir. Elle tourna la tête, la douleur le lui fit regretter très vite. Gajeel-kun entra dans la chambre, voyant sa chaise occupé il s'assit sur le lit, à droite de Juvia.

« My name is Manon, I'm th-, commença l'infirmière mais Gajeel-kun la coupa.

- I know, I've run on the doctor, he told me.

-Okay. Elle se tourna vers Juvia. Votre amie a …, elle fut de nouveau coupée mais cette fois par Juvia.

- Juvia sait. »

Elle regarda Juvia puis Gajeel-kun et de nouveau Juvia.

« Vous avez compris ce qu'il a dit ? demanda-t-elle.

- Non, mais Juvia le sait, elle n'a pas besoin de parler à Gajeel-kun pour le comprendre.

- Vous devez être très proche.

- Oui ! répondit Juvia avec un grand sourire.

- J'ai encore quelques questions à vous poser, dit Manon-san à Juvia avant de se tourner vers Gajeel-kun. I have some question to ask her. » Il acquiesça et elle se retourna vers Juvia. « Quand avez-vous commencé à apprendre l'anglais ? »

Juvia réfléchit un peu avant de répondre « Quand Juvia avait treize ans, elle pense.

- De quelle manière ?

- En écoutant et en lisant ce qu'il y avait autour d'elle.

- Avez-vous immigré à Fiore à l'âge treize ans ?

- C'est ça. »

Juvia entendit encore la porte de la chambre s'ouvrir, le docteur entra.

« The MRI is ready. »

* * *

><p>L'IRM avait l'air d'un cylindre, traversé par un 'tunnel'. Une planche ressortait devant. Juvia s'allongea sur la surface froide de l'IRM et on plaça une cage autour de sa tête.<p>

« Essayez de bouger le moins possible. Je ne suis pas loin, lui dit Manon-san, si vous vous sentez mal ou quoi que ce soit, appelez-moi. » Juvia acquiesça et l'infirmière mit l'IRM en marche.

La surface sur laquelle Juvia était allongée glissa dans l'appareil de manière à ce que la tête de Juvia soit a l'intérieur. La machine fît de la lumière et un son répétitif et désagréable se fit entendre. Juvia se sentait comme enfermée. Elle respira profondément et ferma les yeux mais le son qui venait à ses oreilles ne faisait qu'amplifier son mal être. Respirer devenait de plus en plus dur et Juvia avait l'impression d'étouffer. Son cœur battait si vite et si fort qu'elle pouvait l'entendre raisonner dans ses oreilles. Il fallait qu'elle sorte. Il fallait qu'elle sorte tout de suite. Elle parvint a crié :

« Manon-san ! ».

L'IRM s'arrêta, la surface glissa en dehors. Manon-san et le docteur se précipitèrent vers Juvia et enlevèrent la cage qu'elle avait sur la tête. Juvia se redressa immédiatement elle respirait vite et portait son poing à sa poitrine.

« Respirez lentement et profondément. » lui dit Manon-san. Juvia prit une longue inspiration puis fit une toute aussi longue expiration. Elle répéta cette action plusieurs fois jusqu'à ce que son cœur se calme. Elle remarqua alors que Manon la tenait par le bras et que le docteur avait son… son… son appareil pour écouter le cœur sur sa poitrine.

Il le retira et dit « She's alright, it was just a clostrophobia crise. We still need to do that MRI.

- I know, lui répondit Manon-san, Maybe if her friend was with her.

- Ask her.

- Juvia vous sentiriez-vous mieux si votre ami était avec vous ?

- Oui … beaucoup mieux.

- Je vais le chercher.»

Elle se dirigea vers la porte et fit entrer Gajeel-kun.

« She doesn't feel good so if you could stay with her …

- No problem, lui repondit Gajeel-kun

- But you need to take off your piercing.

- Why ?

- The MRI work with magetic field so they'll be attract by it.

- You're magic isn't base on metal ? demanda le docteur.

- Well yes but… lui repondit Gajeel-kun, Juvia sentait dans sa voix que quelque chose n'allait pas.

- You can't stay with her. Dit le docteur

- Why not ?! demanda Gajeel-kun, Juvia voyait qu'il était énervé.

- The MRI would also attract the magic in you're body, you'll explose.

- Seriously ?

- I'm afraid so, lui dit Manon-san puis se tourna vers moi, il ne peut pas rester avec vous.

- Pourquoi ?

- L'IRM fonction grâce à des champs magnétiques. Vu qu'il utilise une magie basé sur le métal, celle-ci serait attirée en dehors de son corps, ça le tuerait. » Elle réfléchit un peu puis dit « Peut-être pourriez-vous essayer de penser à un très bon souvenir et vraiment vous concentrer dessus.

- Ca aiderait ? demanda Juvia.

- Nous n'avons qu'à essayer, dit Manon-san puis à Gajeel-kun, could you go out please. »

Il acquiesça, jeta un coup d'oeil à Juvia, _tout va bien se passer_, et sortit. Juvia se rallongea. Manon-san et le docteur remirent la boîte sur la tête de Juvia et mirent en marche l'IRM. Juvia respira lentement et réfléchit à un souvenir heureux. Le premier qui lui vint à l'esprit était le plus important de tous.

« Avez-vous votre heureux souvenir ? demanda la voix de Manon-san.

- Oui, lui répondit Juvia.

- Décrivez le moi.

- Juvia venait de se battre, elle avait été battue. Elle était allongée sur le toit d'un bâtiment, incapable de bouger quand les nuages dans le ciel se sont dissipés et que pour la première fois, Juvia voyait un ciel clair et ensoleillé. Il était bleu clair, presque turquoise, c'était tellement magnifique. Juvia n'avait jamais rien vu de comparable jusqu'au dix seconde qui suivirent, où elle vit le sourire de Gray-sama … »

Juvia décrivit son sourire pendant un long moment. Elle raconta ensuite d'autres souvenirs jusqu'à se que l'IRM soit finit. Le docteur dit à Manon-san qu'il devait encore analyser les résultats. Manon-san le répéta à Juvia.

* * *

><p>Après l'IRM, Juvia était retournée dans sa chambre et, allongée sur son lit, avait les yeux fixés sur le plateau contenant son repas. La première bouchée qu'elle avait prise l'avait dégoûté et lui avait enlevé l'envie d'en prendre une seconde. Mais elle avait faim ! Elle tourna son regard vers Gajeel-kun, qui lui fixait sa fourchette. Il était sûrement déçu de voir qu'elle était en plastique. Il tourna son regard vers elle. <em>Tu ne peux pas aller dehors nous chercher à manger.<em> Il la dévisagea puis fit non de la tête. Juvia joignit ses mains en dessous de sa tête en entre lassant ses doigts. _S'il te plait._ Il refit non de la tête. _L' docteur t'donnes ça à bouffer, tu bouffes ça._ Juvia fit tomber ses mains. _Mais heu !_ Gajeel-kun croisa les bras. _Y sait mieux qu'toi c'qu'est bon pour toi._ Juvia pointa son assiette. _Ça, bon ?!_ Gajeel-kun décroisa ses bras, pris sa fourchette, la plongea dans son assiette, l'apporta à sa bouche et lança à Juvia un autre regard. _Bouffes !_ Juvia souffla, agacée. Elle prit sa propre fourchette et commença à manger. Chaque bouchée lui donnait plus envie de vomir que l'autre. Faut que Juvia parte d'ici, le plus vite possible.

* * *

><p>Une fois cette horrible déjeuner terminé, le docteur et Manon-san revinrent dans la chambre. Le docteur sortit avec Gajeel-kun, Manon resta avec Juvia. Ils venaient sûrement expliquer le diagnostique, le docteur l'expliquerait à Gajeel-kun, Manon-san à Juvia.<p>

« Nous avons les résultats de l'IRM, vous avez un léger traumatisme crânien. Vous allez devoir rester à l'hôpital pour être sûre qu'il n'y ait pas de complication. Comme vous le savez déjà vous souffrez d'un syndrome post-commotionnel : l'aphasie. Dans votre cas une aphasie amnésique, vous connaissez les définitions, mais pas le vocabulaire. Vous allez avoir besoin de rééducation orthophonique… »

Juvia la coupa pour poser la seule question qui l'intéressait vraiment. « Quand est-ce que Juvia pourra-t-elle rentrer à Magnolia ? C'était la seule chose que voulait savoir Juvia. Quand reverrait-elle ses amis ? Quand rentrerait-elle chez elle et combien de fois encore devra-t-elle manger ce qu'ils osaient appeler de la nourriture ?

- Quand nous serons sûrs que vous n'aurez pas de complication.

- Ca prendra combien de temps ?

- Difficile à dire. Où en étais-je … ah oui ! La rééducation orthophonique. Vous aurez besoin de voir un orthophoniste. D'abord pour faire un bilan, puis pour suivre des séances régulières.

- Et ce sera quand ?

- Normalement quand vous sortirez de l'hôpital sauf si cela est une perte de temps. A ce moment là nous ferons venir l'orthophoniste ici.

- Il faudra combien de temps à Juvia pour de nouveau pouvoir parler anglais ?

- Je ne sais pas. Cela peut prendre plusieurs années. Vous devriez sûrement voir un orthophoniste toute votre vie. »

La porte s'ouvrit Gajeel-kun et le docteur entrèrent. « Have you finish ? demanda de le docteur.

- I think, répondit Manon-san, avez-vous d'autres questions ? »

Juvia fit non de la tête. Manon-san et le docteur sortirent. Juvia ne les entendit pas ,elle était dans ses pensées. Et si elle n'arrivait jamais à reparler anglais ? Et si elle ne pouvait ne plus jamais parler à ses amis ? A Gray-sama ? Si ça les ennuyait ? S'il la rejetait ? Juvia ne pourrait pas le supporter. Que deviendrait-elle, seule, dans un pays dont elle ne parle pas la langue ? Elle pourrait rentrer en France. Non, après être partie, elle s'était juré de ne jamais retourner là-bas. Mais alors qu'allait-elle devenir ? Juvia sortit de ses pensées quand elle sentit la main de Gajeel-kun serrer la sienne. La chaleur qui en émanait rassura Juvia qui la serra à son tour. Peu importe ce qui arrivera, il sera avec moi, il ne me laissera jamais seule.

* * *

><p>Même si Gajeel-kun l'avait temporairement rassuré Juvia était toujours inquiète et son cauchemar en était la preuve. Le fait d'êtrerejetée l'effrayait toujours autant. Elle avait beau savoir que ses amis l'aimaient et ne la laisseraient pas tomber. Il y avait toujours quelque chose en elle qui pensait que ça arriverait. Quand on a vécu toute sa vie privé à la recherche de quelque chose et qu'on finit par l'obtenir, la perdre devient alors notre plus grande peur. Est-ce pour çela que Juvia a si peur de perdre ses amis ? Est-ce pour cela que ça hantait ses nuits ? Juvia était très énervée par ses rêves. Ils l'empêchaient de dormir et ne faisait qu'augmenter sa peur de l'abandon.<p>

Ses rêves étaient stupides. Les autres ne l'abandonneraient pas juste parce qu'elle ne pouvait plus leur parler. Mais en même temps devoir rester avec quelqu'un sans pouvoir communiquer devait être vraiment frustrant. Et puis, ils ne pouvaient pas apprendre le français, c'était bien trop compliquer. Il finirait par être agacé. Alors il viendrait la voir de moins en moins souvent, puis plus du tout. Mais Gajeel-kun resterait avec elle. Lui n'avait pas besoin de communiquer pour la comprendre. Donc même si les autres partaient, lui resterait. Mais alors lui aussi les perdrait. Il ne reverrait plus aucun d'entre eux. Même pas Levy-san. Et tout ça à cause de Juvia ! Elle allait le priver de tous ses proches à cause de cet accident ! Elle ne pouvait pas faire ça. Elle n'en serait pas capable. Si elle devait être rejetée par les autres elle ne l'entrainerait pas avec elle, jamais. Il fallait quelle soit forte. Il fallait surtout qu'elle essaye de penser à quelque chose de positif. Comme Gray-sama… Ah … Gray-sama…

Juvia passa le reste de la nuit à imaginer différents scénarios dans lesquels Gray-sama lui avouait son amour éternel.

* * *

><p>Le matin arrivé, Manon-san vint avec des livres. Elle lui expliqua qu'il fallait qu'elle sache si Juvia était toujours capable de lire. Juvia prit l'un des bouquins et commença à le lire à voix haute.<p>

« Vers le milieu du mois de Juillet de l'année 1838, une de ces voitures nouvellement mise en circulation … » Juvia lut plusieurs pages avant de refermer violement le livre. Elle regarda la couverture. Elle y aperçut cinq lettres, cinq putains de lettres qui lui donnaient des envies de meurtre. Un B, puis un A, suivit d'un L. Ensuite un Z, accompagné d'un connard de A, puis d'un enfoiré de C. BALZAC. Ce connard qui a fait partie du groupe de personnes ayant gâché l'enfance de Juvia. Elle se tourna vers Manon-san et pointa le livre. « Juvia ne lira pas ça.

- Vous n'aimez pas Balzac ?

- Non. Dit Juvia en lui redonnant violement le livre.

- D'accord, j'ai d'autres auteurs si vous préférez. » Répondit Manon-san lui tendant le sac contenant les autres livres qu'elle avait amené.

Il y en avait plus d'une trentaine. Juvia les parcourut. La plus part était d'auteur classique français. Il y avait du Voltaire, du Zola et bien d'autres. Que des grands romans que Juvia avait été forcée de lire durant son enfance. Ce n'était pas qu'elle ne les aimait pas, mais elle avait mal à la tête. Elle préférait quelque chose qu'elle lirait facilement et où elle ne trouverait pas quinze pages de description d'une lampe. Juvia continua à parcourir les livres jusqu'à ce quelle vit parmi tous ces roman un recueil de poésie et pas n'importe lequel : _Les Fleurs du Mal_ de Baudelaire ! Parmi tous ce qu'elle aurait put trouver, elle était tombée sur l'un de ses livres préféré. Elle l'ouvrit et commença à le lire avec grand plaisir. Elle passa toute la matinée à lire, chaque poème lui apportant plus de plaisir que l'autre.

Soudain elle entendit la porte s'ouvrir, Gajeel-kun entra. Juvia n'avait pas remarqué qu'il était partit. Il vint à coté du lit s'assit sur ses genoux posa ses poings sur le lit de Juvia et la regarda droit dans les yeux. _On m'a d' mander d'te distraire_. _… Hein ?_ Juvia eu à peine le temps de réagir que deux mains lui saisir les seins. Elle hurla et fît tomber son livre. Elle tourna la tête pour voir qui l'avait saisi.

« Hey Juvia ! dit une mage de carte qu'elle connaissait très bien.

- Cana-san ! répondit Juvia agréablement surprise.

- And I'm not alone. » Dit elle. Juvia ne compris ce qu'elle disait. Elle regarda son livre là où il était tombé et vit une main le saisir. Elle regarda à qui elle appartenait et tout ce qui pouvait se trouver autour disparut. Il était là. Juvia ne put empêcher un sourire d'apparaître sur ses lèvres. Il était là ! « Gray-sama ! » Elle était tellement heureuse de le voir. Il ne fallut pas longtemps pour que son image s'idéalisa, il était maintenant à genoux et lui disait :

« Juvia à l'instant où j'ai appris que tu étais blessée, je me suis empressé de venir auprès de toi. Nous n'aurions pas dû être séparé, en fait, ne nous séparons plus jamais !»

Elle fut réveillée de sa rêverie par Cana-san qui, ayant toujours ses seins dans les mains, les serra plus fort. Juvia avait crié puis se tourna vers elle. Elle avait un large sourire sur son visage et comme à son habitude ne portait rien de plus qu'un soutient gorge. Juvia était gênée. Elle sentit que ses joues se réchauffaient. Elle devait être aussi rouge que les cheveux d'Erza. Elle vit Cana-san envoyer un clin d'œil vers Gray-sama. Juvia tourna de nouveaux sa tête et vit que Gray-sama avait détourné le regard. Juvia se demanda pourquoi. Cana-san faisait un clin d'œil … Gray-sama détournait le regard. Il se passait quelque chose entre eux deux. Cana-san était une rivale d'amour ! Juvia se retourna vers elle en lui lançant un regard menaçant, auquel elle repondit par un grand sourire avant de lui resserrer les mains. Juvia cria encore, elle sentit son visage entier monter en température. Gajeel-kun se leva saisi les avant bras de Cana-san et la sortit du lit. Juvia était tellement gênée. Elle avait vraiment chaud et devait l'avoué, elle était légèrement excité. Cana-san remarqua alors Manon-san qui avait l'air perdu, elle la regarda puis engagea la conversation.

« Are you alright Juvia-san ? » demanda une petit voix Juvia regarda vers elle et découvrît qu'il s'agissait de Wendy. Juvia ne l'avait pas remarqué ! Elle aussi avait le visage rouge. Juvia lui offrit un grand sourire auquel elle répondit un peu plus timidement.

Juvia se tourna vers Gajeel-kun. _Pourquoi sont-ils venus ?_ Gajeel-kun leva un sourcil. _Ys étaient inquiets pout toi._ Juvia était si heureuse, ses amis s'inquiétaient pour elle. Gray-sama s'inquiétait pour elle ! _Combien de temps restent-ils ?_ Gajeel-kun interpela Gray-sama qui venait de déposer le livre de Juvia sur son lit. « How long are you staying ?

- Wendy is here to see if she can do anything for Juvia, repondit Gray-sama, once it's done Nastu, Lucy and Charles are supose to come and get her. Me and Cana are staying as long as Juvia.

- You aren't going to have rent issues if she's here for long ?

- We discussed this on the train, if it's the case we'll alternate one here one in mission.

- Maybe I should do it too … »

Juvia arrêta de les écouter agacer de ne pas comprendre. Elle se tourna vers Cana-san, Manon-san et Wendy qui avait maintenant rejoint leur discussion.

« … probaly thinks you're a 'love rival'.

- But I just meet her and I've never talk to her Gray.

- She don't need much.

- This is unsane !

- She is, but … »

Là non plus elle ne pouvait pas comprendre. Elle avait beau entendre leurs voix, elle était incapable de les comprendre. Ses amis étaient venus pour la voir mais ne pouvaient pas lui parler. Ses amis la voyaient mais ne pouvait pas la comprendre. Ses amis lui souriaient mais ne pouvaient pas connaître ses sentiments. Ses amis étaient autour d'elle, mais elle était seule.

* * *

><p><strong>AN Merci, merci beaucoup d'avoir lut. Qu'est que vous en avez penser ? Ma manière d'écrire est absolument merdique ? Le rêve au début était nul ? Le fait que Gajeel et Juvia puissent communiquer sans parler vous plait ? Vous aussi vous êtes des traumatiser de Balzac ? Vous adoré comme moi Les Fleurs du Mal ? Review et dite le moi. **

**J'ai fait appelle a une correctrice (BlackMachan) que je remercie infiniment pour sont aide. Il devrait donc il y avoir moins faute mais si vous en voyer prévenait moi. **

**Si vous parlez aussi anglais vous pouvez lire l'autre chapitre 1 qui un POV de Gray.**

**Et si sa vous a vraiment plus vous pouvez folow ou favorite cette fic.**


	3. Chapter 1 The Flower of Evil

**AN/ disclaim: I'm not a doctor I've made researches but that doesn't mean that all I say in this fic is true.**

**This is Gray POV.**

* * *

><p>I was freezing. I was under the snow in freaking underwear! And Lyon had nothing better to do then boring me with things like "an ice mage never feel cold". Easy to say for him, he has been doing that of years, me only few months! Why do we need to do that every day anyway? I hated running through the snowing mountain. The view was pretty good but I was so cold and it last hours! Where were we right now? In a freaking forest? I knew I couldn't go home along. The cold wind blew, I shivered. Lyon made a remark and Ur was laughing at me, great! I sighed, that's when I notice the girl. She was on her knees… she was crying. I walk to her and Ur asked where I was going that's she notice her too. We came to her and Lyon followed us. Ur knelt in front of the little girl.<p>

"Are you alright?" she asked. The kid looked up at her and started running away.

"Hey!" I yelled at her then turned to Ur, tears started to roll down her cheeks. "Ur?" I asked

She started mumbling "Urtear …"Urtear, I knew that word. Where have I heard it? Ur must have said it sometime. What was it? It was … it was… it was her daughter name! I rushed to the girl yelling at her to stop. She didn't but she stumbles over a root and fall head first in the snow. I helped got up holding her arms. Could it be? Could she be Ur's daughter? Lyon arrived and stopped in front of us.

"You're Urtear? Ur's daughter?" He asked out of breath. The girl tried to run away again but elder strongly, she kept on trying. "You're not dead?" He asked. She stops moving and stared at him.

"What do you mean by dead?" she asked.

I said "Your mother has been told that you were dead." She stared look at me for a few minutes.

"She … she didn't abandon me?" she asked.

"How could I?" We turned to see who had just spoken. It was Ur and she was crying.

"You're alive, snort, I'm so glad you're alive!" She fell on her knees crying. Urtear ran to her, open arms and crying. They took each other in the arms. They were crying but they weren't sad, they crying from happiness. I had never seen Ur as happy as at that moment. But sudden her tears turned red, blood started falling for their eyes, there mouth, their ears and their nose. Cut appeared on her arms and legs, they were blood everywhere. I wanted to do something help them but I couldn't move. Invisible hands were making sure I couldn't move and that couldn't turn my gaze away. A strident sound woke me up.

Dam alarm clock! I reached it and switched it off. Why have I activated it anyway? I had that dream again. I had a lot since Urtear died. I wanted to save her; I wanted her to have a better life, better paste and I was feeling guilty about the one she had. I felt like it was my fault, like I should have seen her, save her. I often though about how her life would have been if that we had seen her. She wouldn't have joined Grimoir Heart. She wouldn't have killed anyone, she wouldn't have manipulated Jellal, and maybe Ur wouldn't have died. But if we had saw her that day she wouldn't have meet neither Meldy nor Jellal, maybe me and Erza wouldn't have join Fairy Tail. I wouldn't have meet Master, Erza, Nastu, Lucy, Elfman, Mira, Gajeel, and Cana … Juvia … That's why I put my alarm clock on! I Jumped out of the bed put my clothes on and ran to the guild.

* * *

><p>The day before was supposed to be a normal one. Well as normal as it could get in our guild. I was at the guild drinking and wondering whether I should go on a mission or not. Nastu wanted to rest after our last mission so if I were going to take one it would be along and that was a long time since I haven't. Most of the guild members were here except the few one who like had left on a mission. Juvia and Gajeel were of those. There's been a simple one, just take care of a band of brigand. We expected them to be back in the evening. Which means that I could take a mission without her trying to invite herself? Not that I didn't like going on mission with her, we were a good team but I wanted to go along and I didn't want to hurt her feelings. I was decided so. I went to the mission board before I could go on a mission. Master asked our intention in the guildhall. He told us that Juvia had been hurt during the mission. She was at the hospital in a coma and we didn't know when she was going to wake up. S***! I hated knowing she was hurt; she was one of my closest friends and I cared for her. How did they manage to hurt her? I wanted to kill those guys even if I had never seen their face. I wanted them to have pain and wanted her to be all right. I wonder which of them I wanted the much. I clench my fist, I was so mad!<p>

"Tell me Gajeel kick the ass of does bastard." I said.

"He did and they'd been arrested." Answer master.

I was feeling a little bit better. I hadn't kicked them my elf but they had been that was what madder. And now that I wasn't thinking about how to kill those brigands anymore, I was thinking about Juvia. I hoped she was alright and that she'll wake up soon. What if she doesn't wake up? The guild without her would never be the same, not without her laugh, her weird way of speaking, her bright smile, and her lovely scent … Wait what? Lovely? What was I thinking? How did I know her sense was lovely? I sighed. My mind was going weird recently; it was not the first time I thought something like that. Maybe I was drinking too much? I had quit augment my alcohol consummation since Ultear had died.

"We don't know when she's going to wake up but apart from that is she alright?" Lucy's voice snapped me out of my thought.

" She's … fine but she has been badly hurt to the head we can't know if everything is alright here until she wake up." Answered Master.

She could wake up with brain issue! God I really hoped she was alright. She was really important to me they weren't many people close to me like she was. They weren't many I let get as close to me as she was. Why have I let her get that close? Normally I reject people who try. Well, I did reject her, but she hasn't given up, I did. And now she was in a coma. Did I regret letting her get that close now that I could lose her? Maybe a little.

"She'll wake up." This time it was Nastu's voice snapping me out, "and she'll be all right. She's a Fairy Tail mage after all."

He was always too optimistic, but he was kind of right. And for the first time I was glad he was. She was a Fairy Tail mage and for having a fight she once I knew she was strong, for having chair her sense once I knew what she could take. She wasn't going to die, I was sure of it. I went to the bar to take a drink while waiting for news.

* * *

><p>After six drink and two hour of waiting, Gajeel finally called Master office. Master came back after one hour of talking.<p>

"The good news is Juvia's awake" The hall guild sighed relief, I hold my breath. What was the bad news? "The bad news is she has something call aphasia. It's some kind of language amnesia" Hearing that we hall turned to Levy. Noticing our expectation she started to think.

"Aphasia … aphasia …" she mumbled then said "Yeah I know! It's a disturbance of comprehension and expression of the language the patient can have trouble remembering words or completely lose the ability to speak, read or write."

"Juvia's unable to speak?" asked someone.

"Yes." Answered Master.

"Both language?" asked Levy. What did she mean by 'both language'?

"Only English."

"She probably has lost a bit of French too. It's rare to lose only one of the two."

"What are you talking about?" I asked her.

"Bilingual can remember one language better than the other." She answered.

Wait. "Juvia's a bilingual?" I asked.

"Well… Yeah … you didn't know?"

"No. How did you?" I asked.

"Gajeel." she simply answered. Of course, those two had grown very close now. And he was closer of Juvia than I am. For some reason I felt a bit of anger as I thought that sentence. But still, I spend most of my time with her, why did she never tell me? Now that I was thinking about it she never talks about her childhood.

"How does she end up with aphasia?" I asked

"We don't know yet. They're going to do an MRI to know. Gajeel will call us once it's done" answered Master.

"What could it be?" asked Cana

Levy was the one who answered, "Aphasia can be cause by a stroke, a hemorrhagic, a traumatic brain injury or a brain tumor …" seeing the worried look on our face and she stopped her enumeration.

"How long lasts an MRI?" asked Mira-Jane

"From thirty minutes to one hour." Answered Levy.

We all got back to our sit hoping for the best.

"Where did Juvia learn the French?" I asked Levy

"She was born in France." She answered. I couldn't believe it. Juvia knew all about me and I knew nothing about her.

"Hey Lucy, don't you know the French? Isn't it in the perfect lady manual?" asked Cana

"I am not a lady!" she shouted, then sighed, "But yes, I had a French teacher when I was young. I've never been able to speak one line of it. It's impossible." 

* * *

><p>After quit a time Gajeel called again. He and Master talked a long time again, and then he came out of his office.<p>

"Juvia's got a traumatic brain injury. They must keep her to make sure there no complication but her life is not in danger." We all sighed relief. Thank god she was all right. "She'll need the help of a speech therapist to regain her language." I didn't know what the hell it was but we'll find one." Also we thought that maybe Wendy could do something for her."

"Hum ... Yes maybe… I need to see her to know." answered the young mage.

"You can't go along!" exclaimed Charles. I didn't understand why she was so over protective with Wendy, she's a dragon slayer. She didn't need help from anyone but if she was going to see Juvia…

"I'll go with her." I said. For some reasons I really wanted to see her.

"That's a good idea." said master. "I sure Juvia'll be glad to see some friends."

"Then I'm going too!" shouted someone "Me too!" shouted another one, and quickly the all guild proposed itself.

"QUIET!" shouted Erza. The all guilds went silent and calm. "What do you think Master?"

"We can't send the all guild; let's just send Wendy, Gray and …" he looked around, "Cana. You two are quit close, isn't it?"

"Yeah, we are." Answered the alcoholic.

* * *

><p>So it was settle me, Wendy and Cana will go to Kimugi the next day; I went back to my apartment. I was looking forward to see Juvia. I didn't know why, even if I saw her I wouldn't be able to talk to her, and yet it didn't madder. I wanted to see her, just see, not talk or anything, just see. See if she was alright, see if she still had her smile, see if she had still that light in her eyes, see if her hair was still of that sea bleu, see if she was still as cute when she was going crazy. What!? What the hell was I thinking again!? She was my friend! I couldn't think that way of her! Why was I?! Probably because she always crawling up on you and that everyone tease you about it. Yeah that must be it. Having everyone telling me that I should feel that way must push my subconscious to think this way or something like that. Sometimes away from the guild and Mira will get that out of my head. With Cana? If I ask to leave me fuck along with it she'll do. I put my alarm clock on, collapse on my bed and fall asleep.<p>

* * *

><p>Once I arrived to the guild I saw that Wendy and Cana where already waiting for me in front. They came to me we went to the train station, we bought ticket and get on the train. Wendy and Cana sat next to each other I sat on the opposite banc.<p>

"Here's the plan," started Cana "We arrive in two hours, we find a hotel, we grab something to eat and we go to the hospital, okay?"

"Okay." So we'll only see Juvia in the afternoon. I didn't need to get impatient, it wouldn't change anything and I would only get tease.

"Also I've bought this." she took a book out of her purse black and yellow book named 'French for dummies'

"You want to learn French?" asked Wendy "Lucy-san said it was impossible."

"Impossible n'est pas français."

"What?" Wendy and I asked.

"French expression. Anyway Levy also have one she already speak several dead language. I think she'll be able to learn a living one." I agree with her if someone could learn French it would be Levy.

The travel went on; Wendy fell asleep and Cana keep on reading, which was freaking weird… I mean … Cana reading! Thinking about it was already weird but seeing it! I would have taken picture if I had a camera. No one would ever believe me at the guild. The world went back to normal when she took a bottle out of her purse. After a moment she decided to take back the conversation.

"I think we should stay as long as Juvia." She said.

"Why?" I asked.

"She can't talk to anyone. She must feel a bite lonely. Having us around could be good for her." She answered.

Maybe she was right I knew Juvia well in off to know she didn't liked to be alone. "Okay, but what about Wendy?"

"I've already asked Nastu and Lucy to come pick her up once she's done with Juvia. Charles invited her but it doesn't madder."

"I could have brought her back."

She smirked. "But you're staying. Also 'bout rent 'cause we still need money to pay it I thought what we could do is alternate mission and staying between the two of us."

"Seems right." I simply answered. How could she be sure I'll be staying?

She raised her eyes and sighed. Have I said that out loud? No I'd notice. Did she expect me to say something? What does she expected me to say? That she was a genius? She had found a good idea and guessed that would stay that wasn't a miracle. It was less than 2p.m., she wasn't drunk and reading THAT was a miracle.

* * *

><p>We arrived to the train station and start looking for a hotel. We founded one but he was far away from the hospital so searched for another one unsuccessfully. We went back to the first one.<p>

"Hi dude we need to room." Said Cana to the receptionist.

His eyebrow twitched, he looked at us, one by one, from foot to head, gave us weird look especially to me. I look at myself and noticed I wasn't wearing a shirt. The guy didn't seem glad seeing us but he answered casually. "We have two rooms for two left." while taking two keys from the shelf behind him.

"Great. We take them." said Cana snatching the key from his hand.

I looked around see if I could find my shirt by chance he was one the floor close to the door from where we got in. I pick it up and put it on. We walked to the second floor where our room were, mine at the end of the corridor, Wendy and Cana's in the middle. I threw my bag one my bed, sit down next to it and stretch myself. The train travel had really exhausted me and the day wasn't over. We decided to lunch at the hotel. We were waiting for our food; I was tapping nervously on the table with my finger.

"Calm down." said Cana. "You'll see your love soon."

I frown at her. "I'm **not** in love with Juvia."

"I know that Gray." She replied I look at her with questioning look. "I was referring to Gajeel." She said with a big smile.

I sighed irritated "I'm not gay easer."

"Well…" Wendy started hesitating "You're refusing a really beautiful woman …"

"Wendy not you too!"

We finally had our food and that conversation was over. Why did everyone have thought that way? Nor I was in love with Juvia nor was I gay. Can't a guy be friend with his stalker … Oh…? That's why! Sometimes I forgot she's excessively in love with me. Poor girl but it's not my fault if I don't like her that way.

* * *

><p>Once we finish eating and went to the hospital. We were going asked at the reception were we could find Juvia when Gajeel arrived.<p>

"Ya've brought Wendy. Good." He said as a hello.

"How's Juvia?" asked Cana

Gajeel sighed and look down. Oh god what was wrong. "Physically she's alright but … mentally… "

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"She's afraid… and depress… and I dunno 'bout what." He answered.

Juvia afraid and depress? She was always strong and optimistic. What could scare her like that? The worst thing that could happen to her was not being able to speak English again. That wasn't the end of the world, was it? Yes none of us spook French but we could learn we weren't morons… Well not all of us. Levy could perfectly learn it. Juvia was smart she should know that. Then what was she afraid of?

"Good news is: I know exactly how to make a girl smile!" said Cana with a wink. "I'll just need you to distract her for two second. You can do that?" Gajeel look at with a skeptical look. "Com one dude! Trust me." I wouldn't trust her.

"Okay." Answered Gajeel. God only knew what Cana was preparing.

"Anything else we need to know?" she asked.

"There's the nurse Manon she's with her, she's French and speak English."

"Love rival?" asked Cana. What was she talking about?

"Like hell if I know!" answered Gajeel. What were they talking?

* * *

><p>We arrived to her room I could hear her voice. She was speaking with enthusiasm and she didn't sound depress at all. What was she saying? I couldn't get anything it was French. I've noticed that every of her sentence rhymed. Maybe she was reading some kind of poem? Her voice was sweet and pleasant to listen. We arrived in front of her door, Gajeel step in, he passed in front of woman in nurse uniform, Manon I presumed, she was a little shorter than Juvia , had black curly hair, dark skin, brown eyes. In front of her was a white bed and on it was Juvia. I couldn't see her face she was turned to Gajeel, she was wearing white dress who looked more like an oversize t-shirt, her hair seemed a bite a curlier than usual but was still as bleu, she had a few bandage around her head but no other wound, she had a book in her right hand probably what she was reading. Cana walk quietly inside the room, Wendy and I step in too. Cana walked to the back of Juvia and quickly grabbed her … breast. What the hell is she doing!? Juvia leave out a scream and leave her book fall on the ground. She turned her head to see who had grabbed her.<p>

"Cana-san!" she said happily

I made a few step and pick up her book.

"Gray-sama!" she shouted sounding even happier than for Cana. Her eyes turned heart shape she pass inside of one of her awaken dreaming phase. I could finally see her face she had circle under her eyes, but they were still that light in them and her smile was still as bright as usual. Cana squeezed her breast, she left out another scream. I felt heat coming to my face, was I blushing? Juvia turned back to Cana a huge blush on her face, which made her kind of cute. What? I felted more heat coming to my face I was definitely blushing. Cana sent me a wink I quickly turned around to hide myself. I look on the window I could see my reflection I was indeed blushing. Shit! Why was I? Stupid question there were one girl squeezing the breast of another. You've seen Erza and Lucy naked why didn't you react that way? I felt if it was possible, more heat coming to my face. Th-That wasn't the same I saw them naked a thousand time and they weren't … doing that. I heard Juvia scream again and a mental image of what they were doing prompt in my brain. I surprised myself trying to look at the scene thought the reflect in the window. I shook my head and force myself to look elsewhere. I brought my intention to the book I had in my hand. They were to sentence on the cover 'Les fleurs du mal'. Probably the title of the book and 'Baudelaire' probably the writer. I had already heard that name somewhere but couldn't remember. Maybe I heard Levy and Lucy mention it in one of their book talk. Or was it Juvia? No we never talked about book and I remembered everything she told me. I turned around and notice that Cana had let go of Juvia and was now talking to the nurse. Juvia and Gajeel were exchanging look, were they trying to communicate? I put the book on Juvia's bed.

"Hey, stripper." I look up at Gajeel who had just called me. "How long are you staying?"

"Wendy is here to see if she can do anything for Juvia" I answered ."Once its done Nastu, Lucy and Charles are supposed to come and get her. I and Cana are staying as long as Juvia."

"You ain't going to have rent issues if she's here for long?" Gajeel caring about us? That couldn't be true. Did he want us far?

"We discussed this on the train." I answered. "If it the case we'll alternate one here one in mission."

"Maybe I should do it too or I'll be kicking out." He answered. Here's the real reason he asked.

"Yeah we can ad you to the thing." I-We could stay a longer time like that. "But I don't think she'll stay that long."

"Yeah." he seemed annoyed.

What about all of us going home could bother him? If we go home Juvia would be all right. He said she look depress … does he think it would worst in Magnolia? I looked at her and I noticed how sad and afraid she was. Why? Why did she felt that way? Her friends was there she should be glad seen them. What could bother her? I looked around Cana and Wendy were talking happily with Manon. I've been talking with Gajeel. She could feel a bit out of the conversation but she could still joined in. No, she couldn't. She couldn't speak English. We were with her without really being.

She could hear our voice but couldn't listen. Her friends were here to see her but couldn't speak to her. Her friends were seeing her but couldn't understand her? Her friends smiled to her but couldn't know her feeling. Her friends were around her but she was lonely.

* * *

><p><strong>AN Thank you very, very much for reading. What do you think of the chapter? Is my writing so awful that I should stop? Did the dream in the beginning suck? How do you fell about Gray not notice his obvious feelings? Review and tell me.**

**Also Juvia's book 'Les fleurs du mal' is a poetry book his English title is The Flower of Evil.**

**I now have a corrector (BlackMachan) that I thank a lot for her help. They shouldn't be to much wrong in my orthography but if you see anything worn me.**

**If you have like this you can follow or favourite the fic.**


	4. Chapitre 2 Contacte Humain

**AN/Bon deux mois d'attente et j'vous offre même pas un truc valable...**

**Je n'ais pas écrit le poème que lit Juvia il est de Baudelaire.**

* * *

><p>Juvia était au milieu de la guilde, tout le monde se trouvait autour d'elle. Elle était si heureuse de les voir. C'était comme s'ils avaient été séparés durant des années. Elle voulut leur parler mais ils ne lui répondaient pas. Elle avait beau les appeler, ils ne l'entendaient pas. Alors elle cria leurs noms, hurla à s'en arracher la gorge mais ils ne réagissaient pas. Elle essaya de les saisir mais elle leurs passa au travers et tomba au sol. Elle se releva et remarqua qu'il ne la voyait pas. Elle n'existait pas. Soudain chacun de ses amis devinrent des silhouettes noires. Elles commencèrent à grandir. Juvia se trouva engloutie dans une mer noire, elle ne savait plus où était le haut, où était le bas. Elle ne voyait rien, n'entendait rien, ne sentait rien. Elle ne respirait pas mais n'en sentait pas le besoin. L'eau était froide et sombre mais elle s'y sentait à l'aise. Ici, elle ne pouvait pas souffrir. Elle se laissait flotter dans l'eau les yeux fermés. Puis elle sentit comme une coupure dans le bas du dos. Encore une autre, au tibia, et une autre au visage. Elle souffrait et les coupures s'accumulaient sur tout son corps. Elle voulut crier, appeler à l'aide, mais sans air, la tâche était impossible. Elle sentait l'eau couler dans sa gorge et pénétrer ses poumons avant de les trouer. L'eau rentrait dans son corps par sa bouche et son nez puis ressortait par chacune de ses blessures prenant avec, le sang de Juvia. Elle aperçu des points blancs dans l'eau noire qui se multipliaient. Elle allongea alors, comme elle pouvait, son bras pour les atteindre mais se n'était que des gouttes d'eau plus chaude. Elle les voyait apparaître devant elle toujours plus nombreuse elle semblait venir de derrière Juvia. Elle se retourna mais ne rencontra que l'obscurité. Puis les gouttes blanches apparurent devant elle. Elle provenait de Juvia. Elle porta ses mains à son visage et découvrit la provenance des gouttes : ses yeux. C'était ses larmes. Elle était enfermée dans l'ombre, son corps hurlait de douleur, son sang la quittait et la seule chaleur qu'elle possédait était ses larmes. Juvia n'espérait plus qu'une chose, que la mort vienne enfin la libérer de son supplice. Soudain elle sentit deux mains lui saisir les bras et la secouer. Elle ouvrit les yeux, elle se trouvait dans sa chambre d'hôpital et Gajeel-kun la tenait.<p>

Elle était couverte de larmes, elle les enleva rapidement de son visage. Elle lui fit comprendre qu'elle allait bien et il retourna sur le siège sur lequel il dormait. Même si Gray-sama, Cana-san et Wendy lui avait proposé de venir à l'hôtel, il avait préférer rester avec Juvia. Il voulait la protéger. Mais il ne pouvait chasser les cauchemars de Juvia. Elle se rallongea et lui fit dos. Juvia avait vraiment peur de ne plus pouvoir parler aux autres, elle espérait du plus profond du cœur que Wendy pourrait l'aider. Ils avaient décidé qu'elle ne s'occuperait de Juvia que le lendemain de leur arrivée à cause de l'heure tardive. Même si Wendy était une mage, elle avait besoin de sommeil pour travailler correctement. Alors Juvia comptait les heures avant qu'elle ne vienne. Avec un peu de chance, elle guérirait Juvia. Cependant, elle avait peur que Wendy ne puisse rien pour elle. Elle prit son livre qui se trouvait sur sa table de chevet et décida de lire un poème pour se changer les idées. Elle l'ouvrit à une page au hasard et tomba sur la muse malade, ironique. Elle commença à le lire :

_Ma pauvre muse, hélas ! Qu'as-tu donc se matin ?_

_Tes yeux creux sont peuplés de visions nocturnes,_

_Et je vois tour à tour réfléchis sur ton teint_

_La folie et l'horreur, froides et taciturnes._

Juvia se demanda si les autres pouvaient voir sur son teint la folie et l'horreur de ses cauchemars. Si c'était le cas, pourquoi Gajeel-kun avait décidé de rester ? Si seulement tous pouvait voir sa douleur.

_Le succube verdâtre et le rose lutin_

_T'ont-ils versé la peur et l'amour de leurs urnes ?_

Oui…

_Le cauchemar, d'un point despotique et mutin,_

_T'a-t-il noyé dans un fabuleux Minturnes ?_

Oui. Les images de son cauchemar lui revinrent à l'esprit alors elle appuya sa paume contre son front pris une longue inspiration et repris sa lecture.

_Je voudrais qu'exaltant l'odeur de la santé_

_Ton sein de pensés forts fût toujours fréquenté,_

_Et que ton sang chrétien coulât à flots rythmiques._

_Comme le son des nombreux des syllabes antiques,_

_Où règnent tour à tour les pères des chansons,_

_Phébus, et le grand Pan, le seigneur des moissons_.

Juvia se demandait si Gray-sama voulait son rétablissement, s'il voulait qu'elle rentre à Magnolia, s'il voulait qu'elle reparte en mission, s'il voudrait l'accompagner, s'il voudrait la serrer dans ses bras, s'il voudrait l'embrasser …

Au final, la seule chose qui pouvait empêcher les cauchemars de Juvia, c'était penser à Gray-sama et oublier tout le reste.

* * *

><p>Gray-sama, Wendy et Cana-san arrivèrent dans la matinée, après que Juvia et Gajeel-kun ait… pris pour petit-déjeuner ce que donnait l'hôpital. Ils avaient avec eux, trois chaises identiques à celle de Gajeel-kun, ils s'assirent chacun sur une. Manon-san était arrivée avant eux. Tous étaient autour du lit de Juvia. Wendy s'avança et dit :<p>

« I need to osculate you. »Je n'avais aucune idée de ce qu'elle avait bien put dire. Heureusement, Manon-san était là.

« Elle va vous osculter, dit-elle, Juvia acquiesça.

- It might prikle a bit. Dit Wendy.

- Cela va vous picoter un peu. »

Wendy plaça ses mains autour de la tête de Juvia. Une lueur bleu-verte apparut. Juvia ressentit une sensation très désagréable dans le crâne qui la fit plisser les yeux et serrer les dents. Gajeel-kun pris sa main et la serra fort ce qui eu le don d'apaiser Juvia. Elle la lui serra à son tour. Elle le regarda et laissa son regard vagabondé jusqu'a ce qu'elle voit Gray-sama de l'autre coté du lit, elle le regarda droit dans les yeux et pendant un moment, une seconde peut être, il la regarda aussi. Mais très vite il détourna ses yeux et ses cheveux vinrent devant son visage. Juvia avait cru pendant un instant voir une teinte rouge sur son visage.

« That really is an amnesic aphasia. » Juvia entendit la voix de Wendy et se tourna vers elle.

- That's bad ? demanda Cana-san.

- I can cure the trauma but not the amenesia.

-Shit !

- Que ce passe-t-il ? demanda Juvia à Manon-san.

- Elle peut guérir votre traumatisme mais pas votre amnésie. » Répondit-elle. Donc Juvia allait être hors de danger mais ne pourrait pas parler anglais, génial. Comme si elle avait lut les pensées de Juvia, Manon-san ajouta « Avec une orthophoniste vous y arriverez. »

Juvia espérait qu'elle avait raison, mais apprendre une première fois l'anglais avait été si compliqué pour Juvia. Elle doutait d'en être à nouveaux capable. L'apprendre la première fois avait été une question de survit, là, elle en avait besoin mais elle ne mourrait pas si elle n'y arriverait pas. Peut-être dans les mêmes conditions… Non. Elle ne voulait pas retourner à cette époque, ses cauchemars le faisaient très bien pour elle. Elle prit une longue inspiration, expira et ramena son attention à se qui l'entourait.

« I'm going to heal you but for that I need you to lie down. Dit Wendy

- Elle va vous guérir mais pour ça elle a besoin que vous vous allongiez. » Traduit Manon-san.

Juvia s'exécuta, une fois sur son dos, Wendy plaça de nouveaux ses mains autour de Juvia et une lumière, cette fois ci bleu, apparut. C'était plus douloureux que la première fois, beaucoup plus douloureux. Juvia serra sa couverture de toute ses force et se mordit la lèvre. Elle sentit qu'on serait ses mains, elle ouvrit les yeux vit que sa main droite était toujours serrer par Gajeel-kun. Elle tourna la tête de l'autre côté et vit que Gray-sama lui tenait et serrait la main. Le cœur de Juvia tripla sa vitesse. Elle sentait de la chaleur venir à ses joues et elle le regardait. Lui, lui tenait la main sans la regarder mais Juvia pouvait voir le rouge sur ses joues. Rougissait-il à cause du contact humain ou du contact avec elle ? Rougissait-il parce qu'il avait honte de lui ou d'elle ? Avait-il honte de peut-être s'intéresser à elle ou de l'aider parce qu'elle était pathétique ? Juvia ne savais pas mais peu l'importait. Il lui tenait la main ! Elle aurait tué pour un contact aussi simple avec lui. La sensation de chaleur qu'il lui apportait lui faisait oublier tout le reste, aussi longtemps qu'il lui tenait la main elle n'avait plus mal, elle n'était plus à l'hôpital, elle n'avait plus de blessure, elle n'était plus mage de Fairy Tail, elle n'était plus l'ameonna, elle n'était plus Juvia, elle n'avait ni passé ni future. Elle n'étendait rien appart sa respiration, elle ne sentait rien appart son odeur, elle ne voyait rien appart lui, elle ne sentait rien appart sa main dans la sienne. Plus rien n'existait appart lui, et jamais rien ne lui avais parut aussi agréable que cette sensation. Mais malheureusement elle se sentit soudainement extrêmement fatiguer, elle essaya d'empêcher ses yeux de se fermer mais elle manquait de force.

* * *

><p>Juvia était de nouveaux dans l'espace sombre, froid, sans haut, sans bas, où la seul echose qu'elle pouvait ressentir était la souffrance. Ces larmes chaude s'échappaient de nouveaux de ses yeux et allaient flotter dans l'eau noire, le sang qui s'enfuyait de son corps se mêlait à l'ombre et devenait imperceptible. Très vite, les perles blanches qui venaient de ses yeux devenaient grises et s'assombrissaient jusqu'à disparaître. Juvia se recroquevilla sur elle même espérant y trouver chaleur et réconfort. Mais même si elle sentait ses bras autour de son corps sa peau était plus froide que l'eau. Alors qu'elle s'abandonnait au désespoir, elle entrevit une lumière à travers ses bras. Elle se rouvrit et vit une lumière blanche provenir de derrière elle. Avant qu'elle n'eut le temps de se retourner pour voir se qu'elle était deux bras vinrent de la lumière l'étreindre, eux étaient chaud et réconfortant. Juvia tourna la tête pour voir à qui ils appartenaient, son cœur cessa de battre lorsqu'elle vit le visage de Gray-sama poser sur son épaule. Ses yeux étaient fermés, son visage ne montrait aucune expression mais il était là… il était là…<p>

* * *

><p>Juvia ouvrit les yeux et fut agressée par les néons placés au plafond. Elle plaça son bras devant ses yeux. Pourquoi y a-t-il un néon sur le plafond de Juvia ? Ah oui, elle est à l'hôpital. Pour la première fois elle se sentait bien en se réveillant ici. Son cauchemar s'était transformé en rêve. Etait-ce l'effet du sort de Wendy ? Ou celui d'avoir tenu la main de Gray-sama ?<p>

Juvia entendit la voix de Gajeel-kun dire « Juvia you're awake ? » Elle se tourna vers lui n'ayant pas compris se qu'il avait dit. Elle assimila tout de même qu'il se demandait si elle était éveillée. _Combien de temps Juvia a-t-elle dormi ? _Il regarda l'horloge qui se trouvait au dessus de Juvia. _Deux heures tout au plus._ Juvia était rassurée et étonnée. Avoir trop dormit l'aurait dérangé, mais elle pensait que son rêve avait duré plus longtemps. Elle regarda autour d'elle. Gray-sama, Cana-san, Wendy et Manon-san n'était plus là. _Où sont-ils allés ? Chercher d'la bouffe._ Les yeux de Juvia s'écarquillèrent. _Dehors ? Non._ Le visage de Juvia retomba, Gajeel-kun leva les yeux au ciel.

* * *

><p>La porte s'ouvrit et Gray-sama, Cana-san et Wendy entrèrent avec cinq plateaux repas, Gray-sama et Cana-san en portaient chacun deux. Manon-san devait prendre son déjeuner avec les autres infirmières. Cana-san vint s'assoir sur le lit de Juvia et lui donna un plateau repas. Gray-sama et Wendy s'assirent chacun sur une chaise. Les trois prirent une fourchette, l'apportèrent à leur bouche, ouvrirent la bouche, placèrent leur fourchette à l'intérieure et firent un visage dégouter. Juvia douta qu'il veuille de nouveau manger ici après ça. Avec un peu de chance peut-être décideraient-ils de manger ici mais de ramener de la nourriture de dehors pour eux et pour Juvia.<p>

« Doesn't people here have already suffer in off ? Dit Cana

- Maybe it doesn't taste good but it's healthy. Repondit Wendy

- How could That be healthy I mean …. » S'ils comptaient discuter, Juvia ne voulait pas y prêter attention. C'était vraiment déprimant d'avoir les gens qu'on aime autour de soit mais de ne pas les comprendre. Ca faisait mal, trop mal pour Juvia. Elle prit les Fleurs du Mal. En lisant elle pourrait s'évader. Et c'est ce qu'elle fit. Elle ne voulait pas déprimer alors elle sauta les Spleen et Idéal pour lire directement les Tableaux Parisiens. Leur lecture apporta beaucoup de plaisir à Juvia et lui fit oublier ceux qui se trouvaient autour. Elle fut rappeler sur Earthland par Gajeel-kun qui l'interpellait, elle se tourna vers lui. _Salamander, Bunny Girl et les chats viennent chercher Wendy s't'aprème y t'rendrons visite._ « OK. » répondit Juvia en acquiesçant.

« Did she just said 'okay' ? demanda Cana-san

« Same word in both language. » Répondit Gajeel-kun et Juvia retourna a sa lecture.

Elle était heureuse d'avoir plus de visiteur même si elle ne les comprendrait pas. Ce qui la dérangeait surtout était la possibilité que sa rivale d'amour en profite pour lui voler Gray-sama.

* * *

><p>Manon-san revint dans la chambre de Juvia peu de temps après. Nastu-san et Lucy-san arrivèrent une heure après elle. « Yo minna ! » cria Natsu-san en ouvrant la porte.<p>

Wendy leur souria, Gray-sama leur fit un léger signe de la main, Gajeel-kun fit un de la tête et Cana-san leur demanda « Do you have any booze ? »La connaissant Juvia pensa qu'elle avait surement demandé de l'alcool.

Lucy-san leva les yeux au ciel puis dit « With Mira complimente. » Tout en sortant une bouteille de son sac.

Cana-san saisi la bouteille l'ouvrit, en pris une longue gorgée puis apporta la bouteille aux lèvres de Juvia. Elle s'apprêta à en prendre une gorgée lorsque Gajeel-kun saisi l'avant-bras de Cana-san, pris la bouteille et dit « She's at the freaking hospital ! _Elle dans un putain d'hôpital !_

- Wendy just healed her ! repondit Cana-san.

- I agree with Gajeel it's not a good idea. » Dit Wendy.

Cana-san soupira puis se tourna vers moi et me fit non de la tête. Cela voulait surement dire que je n'avais pas le droit de boire. Juvia soupira à son tour, un verre lui aurait vraiment fait du bien.

« Could I have some ? » demanda Gray-sama en étirant son bras vers la bouteille, Gajeel-kun la lui donna. Juvia avait remarqué que depuis les Grands Jeux Magiques il buvait beaucoup plus. Juvia pensait que ça avait rapport avec la mort d'Ultear, mais elle n'était même pas sûre qu'il était au courant. Elle le savait par Meldy, elle et Jellal l'avis sûrement prévenu après tout Gray-sama et Ultear était presque frère et sœur.

« The Flowers Of Evil ! s'exclama Lucy

- What ? lui demanda Nastu

- That book, répondit Lucy en prenant le livre de Juvia, that's The Flowers Of Evil or Les Fleurs Du Mal in french. It's one of my favorite book.

- Votre amie vient de dire que Les Fleurs Du Mal était l'un de ses livres favoris. » dit Manon-san à Juvia qui la dévisagea.

Lucy-san elle tenait le livre et arborait un grand sourire, un magnifique sourire, elle était vraiment belle. Elle avait de généreuses formes, des cheveux longs et blonds. Elle possédait presque tous les critères de beauté. Il ne manquait plus que les yeux bleus. Elle aurait pu plaire à n'importe quel homme. Elle pouvait plaire à Gray-sama. Elle devait lui plaire après tout, en plus de son physique, elle était intelligente, avait de la culture, était gentille. Juvia n'avait pas tout ça. Oui son corps était bien fait, mais ses cheveux étaient bleus et il lui fallait plusieurs heures pour les lisser. Ses yeux semblaient mesquins et leurs bleus étaient trop foncés. Juvia était plutôt intelligente, n'avait presque aucune culture et au moindre écart de jalousie devenait la méchanceté incarnée. Face à quelqu'un comme Lucy-san que pouvait faire Juvia ?

Lucy-san parlait avec excitation probablement du livre, Juvia aurait tant aimé être comme elle. Juvia s'apprêtait à repartir dans une énumération des qualités de Lucy-san quand elle sentit quelque chose de froid dans sa main. Elle regarda et vit un vers en glace contenant un liquide marron orangé. De la glace, ça ne pouvait venir que de Gray-sama. Juvia plaça son regard sur lui, il ne la regardait pas mais ne regardait pas Lucy-san non plus. Son regard était planté sur le sol et il semblait en grande réflexion. Juvia retourna son regard au verre et y remarqua sculpté un papillon. Que cela voulait-il bien signifier ? Juvia adorait les papillons, mais Gray-sama le savait-il ? Et si c'était le cas, que voulait-il lui dire de cette manière ? Qu'il tenait à elle ? Oh, Juvia aurait aimait que ce soit cela ! Quoi que ça puisse bien signifier, cela lui était adressé et venait de Gray-sama. C'était déjà l'une des choses les plus merveilleuses au monde.

Juvia s'assura que personne ne regarda et avala le verre cul sec. Le whisky descendit sa gorge en lui apportant une sensation de chaleur qui lui manquait depuis son arrivé à l'hôpital. Elle avait toujours le verre dans la main mais derrière son lit la ou personne ne pouvait la voir. Elle sentit une autre main venir à la sienne, son premier reflexe fut d'écarter sa main mais l'autre la rattrapa et plaça ses doigts autour du verre. Celui-ci éclata si bien qu'il parut n'avoir jamais existé. Seul Gray-sama pouvait faire ça ! Juvia tourna son regard vers lui et il détourna le sien en écartant sa main.

Juvia fut deçu de perdre une fois de plus le contact avec sa peau. Elle regarda la main qui, quelques secondes auparavant, touchait celle de Gray-sama. Elle retraça avec son pouce l'endroit où ses doigts s'étaient retrouvés, sur son index puis la deuxième phalange de ses autres doigts et l'intérieur de sa paume. De cette manière elle récupérait une partie de cet instant. Elle releva la tête pour le regarder. Il regardait lui aussi sa main et retraçait avec son pouce les même endroits où s'étaient trouvés ses doigts à elle. Juvia se demandait si lui aussi voudrait qu'ils se prennent la main à nouveau. Elle aurait aimé qu'il lui reprenne la main, qu'il la prenne dans ses bras, qu'il l'embrasse passionnément…

Juvia fut sorti de son fantasme par la voix de Lucy-san « I almost forgot ! » elle cria puis chercha dans son sac, elle en sorti un block de morceaux de papier et le tendit à Juvia.

Elle le saisit et remarqua que ce n'étaient pas seulement des morceaux de papier mais des lettres, il y en avait une dizaine. Les enveloppes étaient toutes signés : Lisanna, Mirajane, Lucy, Nastu, Erza, Elfman, Bisca, Alzac, Asuka, elle sait écrire ?, Levy, Happy… Tous ses amis lui avaient écrit une lettre. Tous avaient pensé à elle. Et elle avait peur d'être rejetée, c'était une idée stupide. Après tout, tous l'aimait et ne la laisserait pas tomber. Qu'est-ce qu'elle pouvait être stupide. Elle décida qu'elle les lirait quand elle serait seule, elle les posa sur la table de nuit.

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><p>Tout le monde discutait autour d'elle. Etant donné qu'elle ne pouvait pas comprendre, elle décida de s'adonné à l'un de ses passe-temps favoris : regarder Gray-sama. Comme très souvent il ne portait pas de haut, ce qui offrait à Juvia une magnifique vue de ses abdos. Ils lui faisaient tellement envie, si bien former. Juvia fut stoppée par Gray-sama qui remit sa chemise. C'était sûrement l'une chose les plus étrange qu'elle n'ait jamais vue, bien qu'il se déshabillait souvent, le voir s'habiller était encore plus rare que de voir le soleil durant son enfance. Qu'elle mouche avait bien pu le piquer ? Sûrement avait-il dû recevoir une remarque désagréable de la part des autres. Quelle déception pour Juvia si elle était incapable de communiquer ! Elle exigeait au moins d'avoir une belle vue ! Elle soupira et croisa ses bras, regarda à nouveaux Gray-sama, lui aussi la regardait. Juvia ne pouvait comprendre ce que signifiait ce regard. C'était comme s'il essayait de regarder à travers elle pour voir son âme. Juvia était gênée par son regard et détourna le sien, elle sentait de la chaleur sur ses joues. Elle devait être entrain de rougir, son cœur battait si fort qu'il raisonnait dans ses oreilles. Elle prit de longues inspirations mais pouvait encore sentir le regard de Gray-sama poser sur elle ce qui l'empêcha de rester calme. Mais pourquoi la regardait-il comme ça ? Juvia espérait qu'au moins, il appréciait ce qu'il voyait. Peut-être commençait-il a développé de l'attirance pour Juvia. Elle n'était pas aussi belle que Lucy-san mais elle avait tout de même quelques atouts. Wendy l'avait soigné, ses amis lui avait écrit des lettres et Gray-sama lui prêtait attention, c'était le plus beau jour de sa vie.<p>

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><p>Quelques minutes plus tard, Charles, Nastu-san, Lucy-san, Wendy et Happy décidèrent de partir. Gray-sama et Cana-san les accompagnèrent. Juvia était au septième ciel, elle s'était pincée à plusieurs reprises pour s'assurer qu'elle ne rêvait pas, puis s'était dit qu'étant donné qu'elle souffrait dans ses rêves, se pincer ne lui ferait pas grand chose.<p>

Juvia se tourna vers Gajeel-kun, il me regardait. Gajeel-kun fit un son désapprobateur. Juvia ne comprenait pas ce qu'il avait contre Gray-sama. Il ne lui avait rien fait. Mais pourtant Gajeel-kun n'appréciait pas Gray-sama et appréciait d'autant moins l'affection que Juvia lui portait. Peut-être se comportait-il tous simplement come un grand frère, et avait peur que Gray-sama ne blesse ça ne pourra jamais arriver, jamais Gray-sama ne se montrera méchant envers Juvia… du moins pas volontairement.

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><p>Après quelques minutes, Gajeel-kun décida qu'il avait faim et parti à la cafétéria. Juvia décida qu'elle profiterait de son absence pour ouvrir ses lettres. Elle regarda le nom écrit sur chacune d'entre elles. Les membres de la guilde dont elle était les plus proches lui en avait tous écrit une. Juvia ne savait pas par qui commencer, elle avait très envie d'avoir des nouvelles de Lisanna, mais les mots toujours optimistes de Nastu-san lui apporterait un grand plaisir à lire. Aussi elle était très intéressée par les ragots de Mirajane, et elle était très curieuse de ce que la petite Asuka avait bien pu mettre dans sa lettre. Comment choisir ? Laisser le hasard décider était sans doute la meilleure chose à faire. Juvia mélangea les lettres et en pris une dans le tas sans regarder. <em>Erza<em>, Juvia ouvrit la lettre excitée et effrayée de ce qui pouvait y être écrit. Malgré le fait qu'elle est passée pas mal de temps avec la Titania, elle n'avait aucune idée de se qu'elle avait dans la tête. Mais le peu qu'elle avait pu observer avait persuadé Juvia qu'Erza faisait partie avec Levy-san et Bisca-san des seules femmes de la guilde qu'elle ne devait pas considérer comme une rivale d'amour.

_Dear Juvia,_

_I hope you're not feeling to bad, if it's so I hope that seing Gray make you feel a bit better. I also hope that Wendy was able to help you and that you're able of reading…_

Juvia arrêta de lire. Non, pitié, non. Elle prit une autre lettre,_ Lucy_.

_Hey Juvia !_

_I know you've just see me but I want to write you a letter anyway…_

Non, ça ne pouvait pas arriver ! Non !

_Hi Juvia._

_We all hope you're felling better and that Gray don't act to stunder, stunder isn't manly…_

Ho, non. Je vous en supplie non.

_Aye Juvia !_

_I'll be here in a few hour, I'm coming with Nastu, Lucy and Charles …_

Non, non, non. Juvia senti une larme coulée sur ses joues.

_Hello Juvia,_

_How are things ? Did you know that… _

Elle devait trouver la lettre de Levy-san peut être la sienne…

_Hi Juvia,_

_I hope you're not too bad and that Gajeel isn't being to…_

Juvia laissa tomber les lettres. Qu'est qu'elle pouvait être stupide. Son euphorie lui avait fait oublier la dure vérité, que même si Gray-sama l'avait regardé, même si tous ses amis pensaient à elle, elle ne pourrait pas savoir ce qu'ils voulaient lui dire. Elle avait eu des amis autour d'elle toute la journée sans pouvoir leur dire un mot et elle s'imaginait sans doute comprendre leur mots dans leur lettres, mais qu'elle conne. D'un mouvement de la main elle fit voler les lettres. Elles s'éparpillèrent sur son lit et certaines tombèrent sur le sol.

Ses larmes coulaient de plus en plus nombreuses. Tout ne servait à rien. Elle était seul et le resterait, peu importe ce qu'elle ferait, elle ne pourrait jamais comprendre se qui l'entourait. Même si elle restait proche de ceux qu'elle aime, il y aurait toujours un mur entre eux. Juvia pleurait tellement qu'elle en avait du mal à respirer. Elle était pathétique, au fond José avait raison, s'attacher n'amène qu'à être blessé ensuite. Elle ne voulait pas qu'on l'entende, elle avait honte d'être aussi faible, alors elle enfonça sa tête dans son coussin, elle le serra espérant y trouver du réconfort.

Juvia n'entendait plus rien à part ses sanglots, elle ne s'entait rien à part l'odeur du coussin trempé par ses larmes, elle ne voyait rien à part l'eau qui remplissait ses yeux, elle ne sentait rien à part la douleur dans son cœur.

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><p><strong>ANMerci énormément d'avoir lut. Si vous avez le temps et pas trop la flemme dite moi se que vous en avez penser. Si sa vous intéresse se qui va se passer ensuite folow cette histoire. Si sa vous a plus vous pouvez fav' cette histoire.**

**Aussi vous pouvez remercier BlackMachan qui a corriger tout le texte.**


	5. Chapter 2 Humain Contact

**AN/ It took two months to do that and it doesn't even worth it.**

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><p>I was in Juvia's hospital room sitting on a chair in front of her bed. She was sitting on her knees on the blanket. She was wearing her hospital dress, but didn't have any bandage or brush. She was looking healthy and happy. She looked at me with this look, the one she only reserve to me, and a soft and loving look. She smiled at me and blushed a bit; she chuckled softly, sighed and looked at me again. The light of sun were arriving one her making her dress a bit transparent. She looked down at herself, blushed harder, bit her lips and look up at me. She seemed happy and shy, which made so cute. I smiled a bit but then I noticed to arm coming from behind her. They grab her breast and started to squeeze it. Juvia scream in shocked and looked around he for… help or from her aggressor? I didn't know all I could focus on was breast and the way it was squeeze by the hands. I wanted them to be my hands and just as I thought that they became mine. Juvia calmed down and looked at me. I started to massage her breast, she fell slowly on her back. I was on top of her, her dress disappear leaving nothing between my hands and her chest. While one of my hands keep on massaging her breast the other one went to her back pulling her closer to me. The contact of my bare chest and hers send electricity through all my body. I heard her moan and she put her hands on my back pulling me closer to her. Her head was next to mine I could feel her breath close to my hear, the way she shiver told me she could also feel mine. My hand that had been resting on her breast went to her back hugging her strongly. She started to planted kisses on my neck. I closed my eyes. Her hands went down on my arms and pass to my abs. She was tracing them with her finger. She chuckled seductively and pulled her head away from my neck. I open my eyes to see what she was up to, she was standing in front of me naked with a sad smile on her face.<p>

"You know Juvia isn't going to do more." She said.

"Why?" I asked.

She sighed and looked down. She ran her hand through her hair, looked up at me and said "Because it's all a dream."

I woke up. I was confused. Why was having that kind of dream with Juvia? And why the hell did my mind stop?! To answer those questions it was probably my mind trying to tell me something. What? That Juvia was hot? Thanks I had notice. That I hadn't had sex in a long time? I knew that to. That if I didn't do anything I'll end up using that poor girl? I wasn't that horny. That if I did they'll be no one to stop it? That was true 'cause lest face in the real life she'll do anything I'll ask. But I refused on using her feelings and giving her fake hope. What else could he be trying to tell me? That you should try it in the real life? No fake hopes! Who talked about that? I sighed and sat on the side of my bed. I wasn't going through this mental talk right after waking up and I needed a cold shower.

* * *

><p>I came out of the shower and looked at the time. It was 10 a.m. they only serve breakfast until 11a.m. here so I better go down. I went down the stairs and arrived to the hotel restaurant, Cana and Wendy were already there. I went to their table and ordered something to eat. Cana was reading a book. Dam that sound weird. She was reading her book to learned French. I notice another book on the table next to her fork 'FrenchEnglish dictionary' was written on it. I wonder what she was planning to do with it she couldn't learn the all thing. The waiter arrived with my order, he put it in front of me, turned around to go but Cana grabbed him by the belt.

"Where's my booze?" she asked.

"We don't serve alcohol before 2p.m." he answered.

She let go of him and sighed. "worst than Mira…" she said under her breath. That was true Mira was refusing to serve her before 8a.m. and she was doing scene about it.

"Hey Gray." Cana called me I turned to her. She had a big smirk on her face; I was waiting for the worst. "Had many wet dreams to night?"

How the hell did she…! "No" I answered her as cold and calm as I could. "What's the thing with the dictionary? You're not planning on learning it by heart?"

"No. But once I'll had understand the grammar I'll make myself card of sentence to talk to Juvia." She answered. That was actually smart. She wasn't able to learn the language but with her books she could easily make writing sentence that she'll take to see Juvia. I should try it too maybe.

"I think Juvia will be glad to hear that." Said Wendy.

"I'm not telling her."

"Why not?" I asked

"I want it to be a surprise." Answered Cana. I wasn't sure it was a good idea, she was looking really sad yesterday to me tell her we had find a way to communicate was the best way to cheer her up. But maybe she knew her better than me after all. I didn't know a lot about Juvia. I thought I was withdrawn but she seemed to be a lot more. With all the time we had spend together I thought she had tell me a lot but except the fact that rain was always around her before she met me (which was probably the reasons why she liked me so much) I didn't know anything about her. Well I could guess that the other weren't quite nice to her because of that, and that being a member of Phamtom Lord wasn't a pretty good thing to her since how they treated there member. But that wasn't a lot especially compare to what she knew about me. Which was all most everything. I had told her a lot and she should know even more thanks to her stalking. I wish I knew more, or at least in off to make the sad look on her face disappear.

* * *

><p>After breakfast I immediately went to the hospital. We peck up three chairs; we didn't want to spend the all day up like yesterday afternoon. We came to her room I sat on the left side of her bed, Wendy too closer to the head. Gajeel was already sitting on the right; the nurse that I had forgotten the name of was also setting on the right next to him. Cana took her place in front of Juvia. Wendy stood up from her chair made two steps to be in front of the bed and said: "I need to osculate you." Juvia look at her weirdly, she hadn't get anything.<p>

The nurse told her "Elle veut vous osculter." Probably the translation of what Wendy had just said, Juvia nod.

"It might prickle a bit." Said Wendy.

"Ca va picoter un peu." Said the nurse again, probably a translation.

Wendy put her hands around Juvia's head. A blue-green appeared from her hands. Juvia squinted and grit her teeth, she seemed uncomfortable. I wished I could do something to help but I couldn't come up with anything. Gajeel took her hand and squeezed it, Juvia's face softened. She squeezed his hand back. She seemed much better that was all she needed human contact. When I was in pan I needed time along she needed to have people around her. For someone like that not being able to speak to other must be one of the hardest things on earth. I felt eyes on me I look up and saw Juvia staring at me. I met her gaze and flashback from my dream came to me I quickly turned away. I didn't want it to come back in my mind but I couldn't help thinking about her curve full body, her soft pink skin, and her so kissable lips… With the heat I felt on my cheeks I could tell I was blushing. I needed to pull myself together; Juvia was more than a body! She was my nakama, she was strong, nice, shy, and smart, calm but also always over existed over silly thing, which make so cute. What the fucking hell is wrong with me! Dam Mira and the other had put those freaking idea in my head, and I couldn't get them out! That poor girl was going to make herself wrong idea!

"That really is an amnesic aphasia." Said Wendy getting me out of my though.

"That's bad?" asked Cana

"I can cure the traumas but not the amnesia."

"Shit!" said Cana and I though the same.

"Que ce passe-t-il?" I herded Juvia voice asked. She was looking lost; she had probably asked what was going on.

"Elle peut guérir votre traumatisme, mais pas votre amnésie." Told her the nurse that I still couldn't record the name of. She was probably explaining the situation. She frowned, she was looking rather piss, why wouldn't she, her life would be out of danger but she still couldn't speak to us. The nurse told her "Avec une ortophoniste vous y arriverez." I had no idea what it could possibly mean but Juvia gave her a septic smile, so it was a good new but Juvia didn't believe in it?

I looked at her she seemed lost in her though and not pleasant one. She had a sadness hide in her eye-socket. I didn't know what could make her that sad. But I knew why she was hiding it. The only person to who she could really talk was a stranger, showing it would only make us feel bad. And if I knew one thing about her it was that she always made the other come before her, excepted when it came to love.

"I'm going to heal you but for that I need you to lie down." Said Wendy, and the nurse translate it to Juvia.

She lied down on her bed, Wendy put back her hand around Juvia's head, and a blue light appeared from it. Juvia clench her sheet and beat her lips, I didn't like seeing her in pain.

Last time when Gajeel took her hand she felt better, I took her left hand, hoping to help her. She first opens her eyes to look at Gajeel then she turned her head to look at me. I turned away before I could meet her gaze. I didn't want to blush again but apparently not looking at her wasn't going to do anything about it. The simple fact of touching her hand brought back to me the way I had touch her during my dream. I wanted that again, I wanted to strip her down and to touch her at every part of her body. Holy shit was I really that much I lack of sex?! I felt more heat coming to my face, but it wasn't one quart as hot as my hand that was holding hers. It was like our touch had made a volcano erupted between our palms. I wanted to strip myself a bit but with only one hand it wasn't going to be possible. Her hand was soft and warm. Holding her was made me feel good and weird at the same time. My heartbeat fastened and I felt something… huh… weird in my belly. I was kind of uncomfortable but I didn't want to let go of her hand. But I felt her hand slipping out of mine. I turned to her. She was lying on the bed eye close, was she asleep?

"She feels asleep." Said Wendy, then turned to Gajeel who had still her hand in his. "It happened sometimes." He let go and leaned back on his chair.

"When will she wake up?" I asked Wendy.

"In a few minutes maybe an hour." She answered.

I leaned back on my chair and look at Juvia. I had to admit she was cute when she slept. Not that I like her or anything, it just that when she slept, she wasn't in her fan girl overstatement of everything. She wasn't staring at me, she wasn't accusing Lucy of gods know what. She was just peacefully sleeping. Well now that I was paying more attention, there was something on her face, she seemed a bit unpleasant. Was she having a bad dream?

I was take out of my though by Cana. "Who thinks it's rude staring at someone sleeping?" She said rising her arm. I immediately get my gaze away from Juvia. I hope everyone hadn't noticed what I was doing.

"I'm sorry" I heard Wendy voice said. She was staring at her than maybe they hadn't noticed me.

"Maybe we should leave her some space." Said the nurse.

"Yeah, waking up with people staring at you isn't a got site." Said Cana

"But someone should stay to look after her." I said, hoping it could be me, for some reasons I didn't wanted to leave.

"I'll do that." Said Gajeel. Shit, he was a better choice than me; after all he was her freaking best friend.

"You're sure you hadn't gone out since she got here." Said Cana, with a bit of luck he wanted some fresh air.

"Don't need to." He answered. Cana frowned at him. He looked at her a few second and turned to the wall.

"That's settle" said Cana before walk out, we followed her. I wondered what was going on. Cana had lost an argument. Cana had just lost an argument. Cana had just lost a freaking argument! First the reading and now that! What the hell was happening to her! Was it really her?!

"Where should we go?" asked Wendy. We all turned to Cana.

"I've seen a bar not far from here." She said smirking. Yep it was her. Frankly I wasn't against a drink but I wasn't sure it was the best place for a 12 year old to be.

And apparently the nurse agreed with me."I don't think it's a god place for a child to be." She said.

"She's already 19!" answered Cana. I glare at her, the seven fairy sphere didn't counted and she knew it. She sighed and said, "At least me and Gray can go!" I was okay with that, I turned to the nurse, she nod and we went forward.

* * *

><p>They were a small bar not far from the hospital, we went inside, and the room was dark and messy. We sat at one of the few table, I order one beer, Cana five. We were waiting for our order and she took her book and a pen out of her purse. As she read she underlined part of the text, probably the one she though interesting for her purpose. They were many linguist rules write down in the book, but what scared me the most was the number of exception next to each of them. How can they remember all of that? How can Juvia remember all of that?<p>

Our order arrived I started to drink, I took one slip Cana bring down 2 glass, I never understood how she did to drink that fast. No 'cause being able to drinking a lot could come with training. But drinking that fast, I'm not sure it was physically possible. Well after she was a Fairy Tail mage with us thing like physic didn't really madder.

"So" ho god what was she going to say, "You were staring at your sleeping beauty". I sighed angrily, of course she had notice and of course she had to tease me about it.

If I didn't want her to make me at all monologue about it I needed to change the subject. "What was look exchange with Gajeel al about? And it's me or you've lost an argument?" Hit her to her proud was the best way to piss her off.

To my surprise she didn't start yelling at me, saying she didn't lost anything, no she sighed in a sad way and looked at me with a sad look in her eyes "Well, you know, when you bet on the wrong horse." She said then drank her 3 other drinks.

What did she meant? What bet? She had done a bet with Gajeel and it had to do with staying with her? I couldn't figure out what it was all about. I didn't really want to. Cana life was always way complicated than it seemed I didn't want to be a part of it

* * *

><p>We went back to the hospital. I decided to call the guild and I've asked the nurse where I could find a crystal ball. She told me there were some at the third floor; I went there and called them. It's Mira who answered I asked her to pass me Master. I explained him the situation, he wasn't glad to hear one of his children was in pain. He asked me if we needed anything .I told him he could send Nastu and Lucy over. He told me they'll be there in the afternoon.<p>

When we arrived the nurse took us to the cafeteria, we took things to eat for all 5 of us. I and Cana took two trays each, the nurse said she'll eat with her friends; we went to Juvia's room.

Cana sat on Juvia's bed and gave her a tray. Wendy and I sat back on our chair and I gave a tray to Gajeel. I took my fork, stick it in my plate, bring it to my mouth and felt more disgust than I ever had in my life. Dam how someone can bake that bad. And I though Lucy cooking was awful.

"Didn't people here have already suffer in off." I heard Cana voice said.

I lift my head to give her an approval look.

"Maybe it doesn't taste good but it's healthy." Answered Wendy.

"How could that be healthy I mean have you taste that crap!" shouted back Cana.

While the others were talking I noticed that Juvia was now reading her book, 'Les Fleurs du Mal'. She was completely absorbed by her reading. More she read more she seemed to relax. I even saw the ghost of a smile on her face. When we were at the guild she always had a smile so bright it illuminated the all building. But since we were here her smiles were small and rare. Seeing one of my nakama like that really hurt me. Yesterday seeing us all around her without being able to talk to us, now at least she had a way to get away from it and it made her kind of happy. I smiled a bit.

"Gray." Hearing someone call my named I went back to my other friends, the one who had call me was Cana. "What did old man said?" she said referring to Master.

"He said he hoped Juvia would go better soon and that Nastu and the other would be there in the afternoon." I answered.

"Have you asked them for booze?" she asked.

"You've literally just drink!"

"You call that drinking!"

"Ok." We both turned the other way, hearing a soft voice said that. Juvia was looking at Gajeel.

"Did she just say 'okay'?" asked Cana.

"Same words in both languages." Said Gajeel crashing our hope.

Juvia went back to her reading. I had missed that sound, the sound of her soft cheering voice. She was much better in real than in my dream. I wish I could hear her talk, or just reciting her book like yesterday.

I was missing a voice. What the hell could possibly be going on with me? I don't miss voices. Well I did missed the one of Ul after her death but she was dead and Juvia was alive. That didn't make sense.

* * *

><p>The nurse came back a few times after. I still couldn't record her name and it was seriously starting to piss me off. What was it? Something with an "M", I think.<p>

After one or two hours, the door of the room burst open and Nastu came in shouting "Yo minna!" Happy followed him with Lucy and Charles. I wave them. Cana immediately asked "Do you have any booze?" I roll my eyes, Lucy too but she searched in her purse.

"With Mira compliment." She said as she took a bottle out of purse.

Cana quickly snapped the bottle, open it and took a long slip. Then she turned to Juvia proposing her the bottle. Her lips were almost touching it, when Gajeel grab Cana arm, he took the bottle and said "She's at the freaking hospital."

"Wendy just healed her!"

"I agree with Gajeel this is not a good idea." Said Wendy, whom I didn't understood, she had healed her. Wendy always had trouble trusting herself I noticed. I also noticed the disappointed look on Juvia face when she understood she wasn't getting anything. Maybe I could…

"Could I have some?" I asked. Gajeel pass me the bottle, I took a slip.

"The Flowers of Evil!" exclaimed Lucy. I wondered why she said that.

"What?" apparently Nastu too.

"That book!" She answered as she took Juvia's book. "That's the flowers of evil or les fleur du mal in French." So that what it meant. "It's one of my favorite books." So Juvia and Lucy had thing in common.

I heard the nurse said something to Juvia probably the translation. Juvia was staring at Lucy, and looked a bit sad. She wasn't happy that someone else liked her book? She stopped staring at Lucy to look down at herself. Was she comparing herself to Lucy? Why would she? She had a hurt look in her eyes. Was she thinking of herself as least pretty than Lucy? That was crazy, anyone with a bit of sense would have notice she was way prettier than her. I don't have a thing for her, I'm just a man and she's got fucking long legs.

Anyway Lucy was talking and having everyone attention. I profited of that to make a glass of ice. I also place a butterfly on the side. I don't even know why. I've versed a bit of alcohol in it and put it inside Juvia hand.

I look down, why have done that? Would I've done that for anyone? Dam it! I can't understand myself anymore! Why was that girl so important to me?! We spend lot of time together I must have attached myself to her. We were more than friends. She knew everything about me. And every time I had a problem I came to her. We were almost like Nastu and Lucy. She was my best friend? I was good with human relationship. So I simply decided that every member of the guild were my friends. How could I know if someone was my best friend? It was probably her; I couldn't really see anyone else. My best friend was my stalker. I turned to her; she was holding the empty glass behind her bed. I grabbed her hand to take the glass, she immediately pulled away. For some reasons that bother me. I grabbed again her hand and put my finger one the glass. I use my magic to make it disappeared, her eyes winded she turned to me, I quickly turned and pulled my hand away.

I looked at my hand I could feel heat on my cheeks. I had touched her hand; it was nothing, why was I reacting this way? Without my deciding my thumb start to retrace the place where her figure had been, the inside of my finger, the outside, the top of my palm. I didn't know why I was doing that, but I knew that the only thing that could make feel better would be the hold her hand.

"I almost forgot!" shouted Lucy snapping me out of my though. Lucy took some pieces of paper out of her bag and hand them to Juvia. She took it, looked at each piece of paper on after the other. They weren't piece of paper, they were letters. Everyone had written her one. She was smiling with her real smile, the one that bright the room, the one that made me wanted to smile. But seeing it now only made my sad. Because I knew that it would only make her sadder when she'll realize that she can't understand what's written in it.

Everybody started to talk about the letters, who had send one, what would he have write. I looked at her. She was looking at me, not directly at me. She was looking at my chest. I looked down and noticed I wasn't wearing a shirt. My shirt was on the floor. I took and put it on. I was use to people looking at my body, but when it was Juvia I was uncomfortable.

I looked at her, this time she was really looking at me. I wondered who she was. I didn't know anything about her. Why did she like me? That was one of the biggest mysteries about her. She turned her head away, she was blushing. I sighed and smile, even if I changed my way to think about her she would always be the same. What did I already knew about her? I knew she liked me, she was a water mage of Fairy Tail and she used to be a part of Phantom Lord. Why did she never say anything about her past? She was now smiling again, she had a pretty smile. I didn't like her, well not like she wanted me to, she was my friend and I liked seeing her smile and smile with her.

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><p>Charles decided it was time to go. Cana and I accompanied them out of the hospital. On the way I've decided to ask Lucy about the book.<p>

"I was wondering what the book Juvia keeps on reading is? The Flowers of Evil?" I asked. They all (expected Cana) stop walking and stared at me as if I had just challenge Erza.

"What?" I asked.

"She did us a two hour speech about it!" Said Nastu pointing at Lucy. "Where were you?"

I didn't know what to say, I couldn't answer that I was busy staring at Juvia, they would get the wrong idea.

"He was busy looking at the little mermaid." Said Cana. How did she know? And what's her thing with fairy tale?

"I'm going to do it short." Started Lucy. Nastu and the other (excepted Cana) sighed relief.

"The Flowers Of Evil is a poem collection of Baudelaire. It's about… well its naturalist…"

"Okay, do you know what her deal is?"

"No, she must… like it?" She said shrugging her shoulder.

"Could you lend it to me?" I asked.

She looked at weirdly than smirk. "Sure. But we're going so you won't have it before you came back."

"Since Wendy heals Juvia I don't think we'll stay to long." She nods.

We kept on walking. We arrived out of the hospital said goodbye. Cana and I went back inside to Juvia's room. On the way we meet Gajeel who was going to the cafeteria. Cana went with him, I told them I joint them and I went to her room.

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><p>I open the door and I found her lying on her bed, crying on her pillow. That vision brought a great pain to my chest; I squeeze it with my hand. She was on her side, her knees close to her chest, squeezing her pillow hard. They were open letters scatter on her bed and a few on the floor. I knew she would be hurt once she opened them. An idea came to my mind. I walk in she couldn't hear me through her tears, I took all the letters and walk out.<p>

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><p><strong>AN Thank you so much for reading. If you have the time tell me what you think. If it's bad so I can do better next time. If it's go to encourage me. If you're interested in what happened next you can folow the fic. If you like this fic you can fav' it.**

**Also and mostly you can thank BlackMachan who corrected the text.**


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